I Won't Do It To Ya, I'll Do It With Ya!

That's what President Barack Obama told the NEA when he was a candidate.  Everyone knew Obama supported charter schools.  No one knew he would insist that states drop charter caps. No one expected he'd give his blessing to firing an entire high school staff based on test scores, or that he'd end up largely a frontman for Bill Gates and the Wal-Mart family.

The NEA, last week, voted no confidence in the President.  They know he lied to them, and it's perfectly reasonable to lose faith in purveyors of lies.  The AFT, on the other hand, invited Gates to the convention and offered him several standing ovations.

In fact,  we know very well what Bill Gates has done.  We know that he started the small school movement, and that dozens of city schools have been closed to make way for them.  We know that the new schools were stocked with kids who didn't include the ones who'd enabled the scores that set the stage for said closings.

Also, we know that when Gates himself abandoned the small school notion, we were still stuck with it.  The fact that ideas don't work means nothing to Joel Klein, and as small schools fail, despite their unfair advantages, he closes them and replaces them with even newer ones.  From that, a sensible person can infer we will be stuck with his current and future bad ideas too, as Gates drops seed money for whatever else strikes his fancy and we're left footing the bill to continue whatever idiocy suited him before he came to his senses, however briefly.

The watchword here is accountability, and it's significant that neither Joel Klein nor Michael Bloomberg is accountable for anything whatsoever.  Everything, and I mean everything, is dumped upon the laps of unionized teachers.

A theme of Gates' that seemed to resonate with the crowd was that cooperation of teachers was paramount for "reforms" to work.  That's ironic, considering that there's no evidence whatsoever that any "reforms" have worked at all.  The "reform"of the moment is value-added, or holding teachers responsible for test scores.  After all, under the new paradigm, swallowed hook, line and sinker by Randi Weingarten and Michael Mulgrew, neither Joel Klein nor Bill Gates nor parents nor society nor kids themselves are responsible for anything whatsoever.  

Here's the thing, though--Bill Gates does not enlist the cooperation of public school teachers.  He has no respect for them whatsoever, and invidiously compares them to KIPP teachers with no basis in fact.  And cooperation of teachers, to him, entails gaining concessions from leaders who don't bother to consult with rank and file.

UFT President Michael Mulgrew told the Delegate Assembly in September it was vital we cooperate with Bill Gates to find ways to measure teacher effectiveness.  Yet before the results of that program were even available he negotiated a "value-added" method of evaluating teachers in NY State with no input whatsoever for members.  There is no research whatsoever to suggest this method has any validity.    The UFT rationalizes this by saying only 40% of teacher rating will entail value added.  They state it's 50% in Colorado (thanks to Randi Weingarten, which they conveniently omit).

Unlike the NEA, the AFT has learned nothing from the lies of Barack Obama.

Or worse, they're cynically selling us out for no good reason at all.  Either way, it's beyond the pale, and these leaders are not working in the interests of working teachers.  Nor are the delegates, who seem to applaud on command as teachers face the most serious threats to the profession I've seen in a quarter-century on the job.

Any New York City delegate who applauded Bill Gates most certainly does not represent rank and file.   How these people sleep at night after having cheered the AFT sellout to the most destructive force in pubic education today simply boggles my mind.

Faux Democrats March On

From somewhere deep in Bill Gates' pocket, disgraced and unelected lame duck New York Governor David Paterson decided to take even more money away from public schools and give it to charters.  Apparently, the governor felt the draconian cuts we were already experiencing were insufficient.  In my school, I saw young teachers being excessed as a result of these cuts, and it was heartbreaking.

But for Governor Paterson, that wasn't enough.  Nor was it enough for the Wal-mart family or hedgefund managers who dictate what happens in American education.  Not only do charters not get cut, they get more.  Clearly, to the politicians the charter lobby owns, the 3% of kids who attend charters are more important than the 97% who do not.  Watch out for Andrew Cuomo, headed your way in a November election.

It's vital that teachers unite and send these people a message.  Don't believe the demagogues who claim that ruining our schools, demoralizing teachers, and revolving kids' lives around test scores is "for the kids."  Kids need smart, independent teachers--not a bunch of frightened automatons subject to being fired at the drop of Eli Broad's hat.  Kids need decent, clean facilities.

And our kids are not little robots who run around back and forth taking tests to make Michael Bloomberg look good.  Make no mistake--the widespread proliferation of charter schools is aimed squarely at the destruction of public schools, which are a real drag on the tax bills of billionaires.  For many uninformed Americans, reducing the tax bills of billionaires is our prime directive.

We're teachers.  It behooves us to know better.  Paterson can still do damage, but come November let's send a message that he and all his ilk are unacceptable and will feel our wrath.   In fact,  let's hope against hope the AFT sends Bill Gates that same message when he shows up as their honored guest.

We're Havin' a Party

In Seattle today, Unity members are reaping what they've sown.  A free trip to Seattle, and a few days in a hotel.

Ostensibly, they're representing the United Federation of Teachers.  That would be you and me. But really, they're representing the Unity Caucus.  That's a special fraternity, open by invitation only.  That's not you and me.  That's whoever they say it is.

In fact, every one of them has signed an oath to express disagreement with the Caucus only within the Caucus.  Every one of them has pledged to support Caucus decisions, however they may feel about them,  outside of the Caucus. 

Albert Shanker threw people out of Unity Caucus for opposing the Vietnam War.  More recently, I heard of a chapter leader expelled from the caucus for inviting a speaker to a meeting--a speaker of which the Caucus did not approve.  So much for freedom of opinion.  One fewer person in Seattle, I suppose.

Nonetheless, Unity doesn't discriminate.  No matter how big, no matter how small your school may be, as long as you've signed an oath to support whatever they've told you to support, you get to go there, stand up for whatever they've told you to stand up for, and let the world know you believe whatever they've told you to believe.  It doesn't matter if your school has ten teachers or a thousand teachers--your chapter leader is there in Seattle supporting whatever the Unity Caucus says needs supporting.

This week they're supporting a forum for uber-"reformer" Bill Gates.  Here's the man who started the small-schools movement, the one that's resulted in dozens of past, present and future school closings in New York City.  Maybe your school is next,  or maybe my school, or maybe your kid's school.  Though Bill doesn't support small schools anymore, having learned they aren't the magic bullet, he's off supporting other magic bullets like charter schools.  And Joel Klein supports the small schools regardless.  I haven't heard Bill Gates repudiate Klein's use of them, and I don't suppose the AFT will hear him do so either.

Are there problems in your school?  Is it on the verge of closing?  Are you going to become an ATR?  Will Bill and his buds, the Wal-Mart family and Eli Broad, put their billions behind having you fired? Is your school overcrowded?  Are there dozens of class size violations?  Do you think the UFT should be worrying about those things?

Well, the Unity Caucus disagrees, and what they say goes.  They're having a party right now so don't bother them with your petty nonsense.

And that's the system 91% of the 30% of teachers who bothered to vote voted for.

It's becoming very clear to me why the other 70% didn't bother.

Why Should It Be Easy to Fire Someone?

I should have sworn off this stuff for the summer, but I was reading the eight gazillionth article on why it's just.so.hard to fire teachers and I got steamed even without a rolling blackout coming through my 'hood and annihilating my a/c. And I got to thinking: Why, really, should it be easy to fire someone? Anyone? Outside immediate threats to people's lives and/or mental and physical health, why should anyone, in any job, be able to be fired instantly? Stop fantasizing about doing it to Joel Klein and think about this for a second.

I've wished, fleetingly, to see a few people fired in my lifetime (I'm looking at you, MTA token booth clerk who yelled at me when a MetroCard machine was defective! And you, JetBlue gate agent who lost THREE separate reservations! but never mind), but I guess I was too much of a softie to really demand it. Oh, maybe those people still "deserve" to be fired; I'll never know because if I ever see that gate agent again I'll run screaming, but NEVER MIND. My POINT (and I do have one!) is that I'm wondering why so many people seem to love the idea of firing "bad" teachers so fast it would make their heads spin.

Again, I'm not talking about teachers who grossly misconduct themselves. No one here is saying that the teacher who poses a threat to their students' well-being ought not to be promptly removed. But teachers can make well-intentioned mistakes; even worse, teachers can do everything right and still end up with unfavorable results (i.e. test scores).

Although the tone of this piece is a little dramatic, the author makes a good point in his introduction: With the introduction of evaluation based heavily on test scores, all the good a teacher might have done can be overlooked. And, as I stated above, a teacher who "does everything right" can still end up with not-so-great scores. And because political leaders are giving into the firing blood lust, it's going to start happening.

So why should it be easy to fire anyone, from a grocery store clerk to a rocket scientist or anyone in between? Why is this country so in love with the idea of at-will employment when it's clearly a good deal for those in power and not so good for most everyone else? Do we fantasize that one day we'll be filling out the pink slips? Or is it good old schadenfreude popping up again? Don't most people deserve time to grow and learn? Are most mistakes so life- or business-threatening that they can't be used as teachable moments? Is there always someone better out there ready to take the place of the washed-up screwup? Or is today's bright young thing just tomorrow's washed-up screwup?

I know this isn't my usual thing. The heat is probably getting to me. Or maybe I'm just sick and tired of people who have never done my job saying that I ought to be able to be fired from it in one fell swoop.

Q: Why Is Arne Duncan So Clueless?

A: Because he resides in the echo chamber known only as "The Village."

Consider the Source

We all love praise.  There's nothing like praise from kids--from your students, or from your own kids.  You can see when it comes right from the heart.  I've saved some little notes kids have given me, and I look at them from time to time.  One year I got a letter from a principal commending me for my attendance but I have no idea where that is.

While I don't treasure praise from admin quite like I do that from kids, it's fine nonetheless.  It's better, for example, than the counseling memo I got for strolling into a PD session two hours late.  Still, what if you're garnering praise from, say, Jack the Ripper on what fine work you do?  Would you be proud if Charles Manson sent you a Christmas card?  I'm not at all certain I'd put it out for my guests to see.

So when Tim Daly, who took Michelle Rhee's former post as head of The New Teacher Project, starts writing you valentines, it's time to seriously re-examine your priorities.  After all, Daly's name pops up again and again when it's getting rid of working teachers is on the agenda.   He's famously been behind a report called "Mutual Benefits" that suggested firing ATR teachers and offered no benefits to anyone but the Bloomberg administration and its Death Star approach to personnel matters.  It was full of such blatant manipulation of statistics, even I could see them with a cursory examination.

And who is Daly praising?  None other than AFT President Randi Weingarten.  What are her accomplishments?

1.  She's allowed teacher pay in DC to be linked to "performance" in DC, and allows them to be dismissed more easily at the whim of Michelle Rhee, a "common sense" approach, according to Daly.

2.  In New Haven, apparently, test scores also determine who is and is not a good teacher.

3. In Colorado, she was part of a negotiation that allowed 50% of a teacher rating to be judged by test scores and pretty much allowed teachers to be fired on that basis.  Layoffs will no longer be done on basis of seniority but on the basis of test scores.  Raise your hand if you think senior teachers will be getting the best kids.  Anyone?  Anyone?  Incidentally, these changes were vigorously opposed by the NEA.

Daly goes on and complains because Weingarten didn't lead the changes, but acceded to them.  He says it would have been easier for her to fight them.  If there's any truth to that, since no study supports the validity of "value-added," why the hell did she insist on falling down when no one pushed her?  And why was UFT President Michael Mulgrew, here in NYC, so keen on following in her misguided footsteps?

Perhaps the NEA's frank rejection of this nonsense will shock Mulgrew and Weingarten into reality, and coax them into acting in the interests of working teachers.  I'll keep my eye on the convention.  Hopefully, when Bill Gates spouts similar praise, AFT leaders will join rank and file in copious vomiting. 

When parasites write op-eds in the Daily News thanking you for all the lifeblood you've allowed them to drain, it's time to seriously scrutinize how you do your job.

Another World

I'm a regular reader of Fred Klonsky's blog, and over the past week I've been reading his missives from the NEA convention in New Orleans.  I'm struck by the stark contrast in tone from what I've been hearing from the UFT and our parent union, the AFT.   Most notably, NEA voted "no confidence" in Race to the Top.  As one who shares that lack of confidence, I'm thrilled to see teachers standing up.

Another notable difference was the delegates did not vote en masse as instructed by Unity/ New Action, or whatever its equivalent may be.  In fact, Fred's own Illinois delegation seemed to oppose this motion.  So, at the convention, all the teachers voted their consciences without worrying about being expelled or barred from future conferences for doing so.  I'm very hip on the whole notion of democracy, even for teachers, and I'm encouraged to see that.  (In NYC, there's a concerted effort to crush any possibility of dissent, and the crown jewel, enabled by Randi Weingarten, is the faux-opposition New Action.   Few UFT members understand NA's actual purpose, or realize it couldn't function without Unity support.  Still, it's thus far successfully kept opposition fractured and precluded any possibility of the emergence of a unified and effective challenge to the Unity machine.)

Not only that, but the NEA President got up and stated he and his members felt betrayed.  This is in stark contrast to the attitude of former part-time UFT President, current AFT President Randi Weingarten, who sponsored anti-teacher mayoral control in NYC both before and after it turned out to be disastrous for teachers, parents, and students.   In fact, Ms. Weingarten saw fit to invite Bill Gates, one of the most destructive forces to education in the country, to the AFT convention.  However, union dissidents like me, who support better conditions for working teachers, are specifically kept out.

I hope the NEA attitude catches fire among teachers.  I have little faith it will have much influence on the UFT, which pretty much dominates the AFT.  Sure, we may get a sound byte or two, but since the beginning of the year UFT President Michael Mulgrew has been cheerleading for Bill Gates, inviting his research team in to decide how to impose "value-added," insisting it was necessary, and then agreeing with the state to impose it without even going through with the experiment.  Incredibly, while Diane Ravitch addresses the NEA, Bill Gates addresses the AFT.

It's time to stand up for teachers, and protect the future of our children.  Obama and his minions need to know we're tired of being his scapegoat and will not support him.  We have to not only tell them in advance, but to demonstrate in November that faux-Democrats cannot count on the votes of real teachers.  Have Weingarten and Mulgrew got the belly to stand up and tell them what teachers feel?

I hope so.  That's their job.

Class

Clearly I have none, and it isn't just because school is out.  I just got back from a shopping expedition to one of those outlet centers, and there were some very classy places there.  I went to Off Saks 5th Avenue, where everything was thirty percent off, and possibly buy one get one half off.  I went to look at the suits.  There was one there that was only $700, with the discount and all, black with red polka dots.  I mean, they were small, relatively subtle polka dots, but nonetheless, why pay 700 bucks for that when you could simply stock up at the Clown College down the road (at a much more attractive price)?

In another corner of the mall was Nieman Marcus, which was having another incredible amazing sale, and I looked at the suits again.  There was a brown affair that looked slept in (I think the term is "pre-owned) for just a few hundred dollars more than the polka-dot Saks suit.  And honestly, I've never seen so many ties that looked like polyester but claimed to be silk.  Maybe that's what the hedge-fund managers who own Arne Duncan are wearing, and they can have it.

But I'm no judge of polyester.  Over at the Perry Ellis store, all the suits were polyester, and to my crude eye, every one looked better than the ones at the fancy stores.   They still looked kind of chintzy, but unlike the others, I might not mind being caught dead in one.  As long as I'm alive, though, I'd just as soon shop in Macy's or some other fairly ordinary place.

A lot of people I know like Ralph Lauren.  A few weeks ago, one of my female colleagues was wearing what appeared to be a boy scout shirt.  But when I asked her what troop she was in, she pointed out the Ralph Lauren label.  At the mall, though, the little polo players had all gotten larger, maybe four inches square.  Though my daughter revels in wearing shirts that boast "Aeropostale," I still feel they should be paying me to wear such things.

So I suppose I'm hopeless.  After an hour in the sweltering heat, we turned around and came home.  We almost bought something for my daughter in Gap, but the long, long line frightened us away for good.  I marveled at some shirts that had epaulets.  Who needs epaulets in this weather?

I hope everyone reading this is having a great weekend, and doing as little shopping as possible.

Ay, Caramba!

Nazis Address Synagogue

Klansman Addresses NAACP Convention

Unlikely headlines.  Nonetheless, I keep reading that Bill Gates is addressing the AFT convention.  It kind of makes me glad I won't be there.  What the heck can Bill Gates, who knows nothing but union-busting, trendy gimmicks, and ungodly alliances with Wal-Mart, tell a bunch of teachers?

Fortunately, he'll largely be addressing those teachers who've openly collaborated with him, so we won't have to worry much about his converting anyone new.  After all, UFT leadership insisted we collaborate with him on a value-added experiment back in September.  Bill placed his surveillance cameras in classrooms all over the city to figure out some sort of rubric for good teaching.  His lies and Big Brother techniques alienated a handful of teachers in my school to the point at which they dropped out, turning down his $1500 payoff.

Then, before this experiment even concluded, before its results were even imposed upon us, UFT leadership made a deal with the state to have value-added used to assess teachers.  They promised us they'd do research.  They promised us they'd negotiate how it was done.  After all, there's no research whatsoever to support the validity of value-added.  I suppose if you're going to do something baseless and stupid, you may as well do it carefully.  Teachers will certainly lose jobs as a result of this, particularly coupled with the rubber-room agreement that makes sure they're dumped quickly and efficiently.

Last week, though, in order to avoid some of the school closings (which, if not for the UFT collaboration on mayoral control, may not have even been a consideration), the UFT agreed that a bunch of schools would begin value-added assessments next year, a full year ahead of the agreement, with no research, no planning, and no specifically negotiated plan.  One might argue, since the entire notion has no validity, that there's no point fretting over a valid model.

Considering all that, why shouldn't the most destructive force in education address his collaborators?  What have we got to lose?  You'd hope that an AFT convention would be a place where they'd discuss a productive future for education, a vision for improving the lot of teachers.

Instead, you've got the Antichrist coming to deliver the Sunday sermon.

Ding Dong, the Kin Is Dead

Microsoft, after having invested who knows how many millions, has killed its cool new phone, the Kin.  Here's the problem--no one wanted to buy it.  So the Kin is kind of a modern-day Edsel.  How could Microsoft, the company practically synonymous with rich guy/ educational genius Bill Gates make a mistake?  It's a mystery.  Why am I writing this on a Mac?  Yet another mystery.

Of course, Bill made a few errors himself.  There was that small schools thing, which was a great idea, except that it didn't work.  Oh well, you can't have everything.  What's important is that Gates is still widely regarded as an expert, despite his utter lack of credentials and his repeated willingness to support ideas that are not only unproven, but which must be repeatedly propped up financially by Wal-Mart to even exist.

Now, of course, we're talking about charter schools, the most recent panacea, the magic bullet that will change everything just like all the previous magic bullets failed to do.  Bill's billions will see to that.  With Eli Broad, the Wal-Mart family, and all the faux-Democrat hedge fund managers, they continue to push non-union charters as ways to get our children accustomed to working long hours with no play time--just as they want them to do as adults.

For our children, though, the ones who will be left with even fewer decent job opportunities, Bill's latest wide-eyed golly gee whiz venture may not prove to be an Edsel after all.

Indeed, it could be the Titanic.

One Is Silver and the Other's Gold

OMG did you know that the last day of school was Monday??? Is there anything like waking up on that first day of vacation and remembering that you don't have to go to work??? THERE IS NOT. Naturally, I am not the least bit excited to be away from my school and stu--OH WAIT THERE IS A PHILOSOPHY MARATHON ON QVC, JUST LET ME GET ANOTHER LONG ISLAND ICED TEA AND SOME AMERICONE DREAM.

Joking aside, I think, I'm simultaneously incredibly relieved that this school year is over and heartbroken to see my students go. I really bonded with my group this year, maybe even as much as I did last year's group, which I didn't think was possible. It's funny; rereading the post I did like this year, I find myself feeling almost exactly the same way. I had a million good reasons to quit or at least to transfer, yet here, at the end of the year, I find myself resolved to come back even better in the fall.

It wasn't even an easy end to the year. A student of whom I became very fond, who I will not even identify by his pseudonym in relation to this incident, did something very foolish near the end that got him into quite a bit of trouble. Several teachers at my school have been excessed, all of whom are fine teachers, ones you would like to teach your own children. And a few people--some I know in real life, others I know only through their blogs--have decided to lay down the chalk, so to speak, for good as of today.

So why am I going back? Forget for the moment that it's a paycheck and a group insurance plan; as a reasonably competent youngish lady, I could surely dig that up elsewhere if I tried hard enough. No, let's look at the fact that, for better or worse, kids are counting on me in September, and that, frankly, I like that. I like knowing that I, personally, matter. I like knowing that there will be at least some kids in that room who care about learning something from me. And I like knowing that I can make an impression on at least some of them. I hate to cast my lot with the "relationship" educators wholesale, but, well, relationships do at least kinda matter. And good ones with children make a big difference--not just for them, but for us, the teachers, as well. Without them, our job is, well, just a paycheck and a group insurance plan.

In the fall, then, I look forward to hanging up my snapshots of the class of 2010 and welcoming with open arms the class of 2011. As the Girl Scout song says, "Make new friends but keep the old/One is silver and the other's gold."

***

By the way: I'm dropping back to one day a week here (Wednesday, obvs) for the summer, only to satisfy my own urges for sleeping late, hanging out at the beach, and home shopping. I wish I had a better reason, but I don't, and NYC Educator was nice enough to let me take it easy for the summer months and come back full throttle in the fall. And if you have any suggestions for a series of posts like my "What No One Will Tell You..." series from last summer, I'm all ears.

It's Your Fault!

NYC Schools Chancellor Joel Klein may not know what the hell goes on in public schools, may not care, may not listen, but he's an unrivaled expert in assigning blame.   When the city closes dozens of schools and labels them failing, it's not his fault.  He seems to think his job is to run the system any way the mayor tells him, but not to take responsibility for it.  When Bloomberg makes draconian budget cuts, he says oh well, that's the way it goes.

One of the many idiotic talking points to justify the Chancellor's abject failure to improve schools is his length of service.  "He's been around longer than anyone."  So have many diseases, but you never see people praising them for it.  And the fact is, he's only been around this long because his primary job is doing whatever the hell billionaire Mike Bloomberg tells him to.  Stand up for the kids?  That's not his job.  So essentially, NYC schools don't have a chancellor--they have another echo chamber for Mayor Mike, just like the toothless and pointless PEP.

So when Joel Klein stands up and says, "Gee, I really wanted to change the idiotic calendar I created, but that mean old UFT wouldn't let me," the NY Post may write yet more crap reinforcing his delusions, but that doesn't make them true.  Joel Klein can change the calendar any way he wishes.  This is the guy who insisted kids come in on June 25th even though all their grades were done, all their tests were done, and they were, for all intents and purposes, finished.   At my school, very few of them came in.  I have that info secondhand because I didn't come in either.

And when Joel Klein comes to the UFT asking for favors, even legitimate ones (as if), the appropriate response is "no."    We gave the rubber room, the ratings, "fair student funding," mayoral control, and every professional gain we'd made since I became a teacher 25 years ago.  For that, we get a mayor saying first, "I'll give you less than half what other public employees got,"  and then, "I'll give you nothing,"  and later, "Maybe I'll lay off teachers even though I'm giving them nothing."  Oddly, when he violates the Taylor Law the papers, which would have crucified us for it, praise him.

If Mayor Bloomberg wants the time of day from the UFT, let him come bearing a fair contract.  Otherwise, let his puppet Joel Klein point his fingers any way he wishes.  Ostensibly, he's the chancellor.  What that really means is this--when schools fail, it's his fault.  When he closes schools based on false statistics, that's his fault too.

Most relevant here, though, is that he can unilaterally change that Wednesday to a PD day without touching the contract.  He doesn't need UFT permission.  When he violates the contract, when he ignores the Taylor Law, which he does as a matter of course, he doesn't ask, "May I?"  Were he reasonable, were he fair, we could say, "Sure, let's do that."  But he isn't, and we can't.

I applaud UFT leadership for declining to make any deals or alter the contract.  I sincerely hope, until and unless the city negotiates in good faith, that they continue to do so.

This Is It

The last day.  Our kids are coming back for their report cards, and this will be the last time we see them this year.  Some are moving on, and this will be the last time we see them at all.  Sad but true.

But tomorrow is the first day of summer break.  Some will actually take a break.  Many will teach summer school.  An acquaintance of mine who hadn't been offered a position eagerly awaited filing a grievance.  "Last year a bunch of people didn't get the jobs, grieved, and ended up getting paid."

Yesterday he called me and said he was finally offered a job.  "It's the next best thing," he assured me.

I had to disagree.  The next best thing, really, is not to teach summer school at all.  Sure it would be great to get paid to do nothing, but if you really want a career like that it's better to get into politics.  I think kids need a break (if they haven't spent the entire year taking one) and teachers need one too.  In Europe everyone gets a month off, and people are in unions that actually have real power--no Taylor Law for them.  It's incredible that we are plagued with President Hopey-Changey, a faux-Democrat who spends his time trying to demean and degrade one of the last good jobs Americans can get.

But I'm not going to think about that today.  I'm going to look forward to a great summer re-energizing, recharging and doing things I really want to do.  I hope you are too.

I hope everyone has a great summer.  Is that your plan?  What are you going to do this summer?

Another Innovation

I've just been notified that the 11 "transformation schools" that were spared the ax under the Bloomberg Inquisition will be "piloting" the new paradigm allowing teachers to be fired after two unfavorable ratings.  This is significant and new because, theoretically, 40% of said ratings will be based on student test scores.

First of all, there is no research whatsoever to support the "value-added" model leaving teachers holding 100% blame for student achievement (or lack thereof).  This is a blatant end-run around tenure, and the union position---it was coming anyway so we did the best we could---is irresponsible and violates the core purpose of union.  For those unfamiliar with the concept, a union is supposed to empower its members, not simply instruct them which way to bend over when autocrats make demands.

I have a proposition below for anyone who believes principals, under constant pressure from Tweed, will actually limit the test-score based rating to 40%.  The notion that individual teachers, like individual schools, should be destroyed based on test scores while Bloomberg accepts no responsibility whatsoever for the school system, his personal fiefdom, is outlandish and idiotic.

Someone has to stand up and speak the truth when the "reformers" make idiotic demands that benefit neither teachers, students, nor the working people the students are bound to become.  It's painfully disappointing to see the union sidestep such a vital role.  The "piloting" program instantly belies the UFT's much-ballyhooed notion that this system would be negotiated and that if it were not acceptable to us it would not be enacted.

For anyone who thinks this is a good idea, please email me as I can offer you a very attractive deal on the bridge pictured above.

Mayor Mike Answers to a Higher Court

In case you've spent the last 24 hours incommunicado, the city has openly announced it's closing more schools next year, including many it was ordered not to close this year.  Bloomberg's contempt for the court order was clear when the city assigned 23 freshman students to Jamaica High School and 21 to Beach Channel.

Apparently, the city will go through another round of public hearings.  Perhaps it will even investigate the effect closing neighborhood schools will have on affected communities, so as to preclude another lawsuit.  But judging from the city's position, Bloomberg's people have no plans of listening to community members.  They can all go to hell because the mayor has made up his mind already, and he has more money than they do.

Just weeks ago Bloomberg announced, supposedly to avoid layoffs, he would not give teachers a raise.   Every single major media outlet, including the New York Times, took this as gospel and praised him for his incredible insight.  None bothered to check the Taylor Law, which requires he negotiate with the UFT.  None questioned his sudden decision to ignore pattern bargaining, which had been regarded as more vital than the Ten Commandments when the pattern was undesirable.

It was good that the UFT threw a wrench in the works with their lawsuit.  However, it appears to have been nothing more than a band-aid on a gaping wound, and Tweed appears to have disregarded it with incredible impunity.  I hope the UFT has something more up its sleeve than the new merit pay scheme it's agreed to.

Klein Considers Doing Something Sensible

It appears the September master plan of having kids come in for the first time on Wednesday, then being off until the following Monday has got Tweed thinking.  This is a positive step.  Had they begun this earlier, kids certainly wouldn't be coming in for a full day today.  In fact, they won't be coming home for a full day today.  They'll be in the park, at the beach, at home, at their friends' homes laughing at the likes of us.

I'll be watching my daughter graduate from junior high school, thank you very much.  Someone else will have to see the handful of my kids who show up, if even that many should bother.

If Tweed persists with its plan to drag kids in on a September Wednesday, I'll explain the rules to the few kids who show up.  Then, I suppose, I'll do it again on Monday, when the majority shows.

Tweedies don't think like that.  That's because they aren't teachers, they've never attended public schools, their kids don't attend public schools, and beyond the thin facade of boilerplate edu-jargon, they haven't got the remotest notion of what the hell goes on in public schools.

If they do the right thing here, it will be the exception that proves the rule.   Unsolicited advice to UFT leadership--offer nothing for this, no more, no less.  If they want 80,000 teachers to teach 200,000 kids one day, fine.  If they want to look like idiots, it's their absolute right, and we need sacrifice nothing to help them.

If they want favors, let them offer us a fair contract, even if it means dipping into Mayor Bloomberg's 3.2 billion dollar slush fund.

Get Out the Tissues

Since this will be my last post here before the last day of school, I figured that the generous and big-hearted readership of NYC Educator wouldn't mind if I got a little mushy. As you probably know, I teach eighth grade, so my kids are out the door for good. There are some I'll miss more than others, of course, but on the whole, I'll miss this group a lot. While I plan on going into more detail on my own blog in the coming days, I thought I might provide just this one vignette for you here.

We had our senior dance recently, and though this is but a middle school event, most of my students, particularly the girls, take it quite seriously. There are always elaborate hairdos, sumptuous dresses, and professional makeup jobs. I find it a little over-the-top, personally, but I can't possibly give them a hard time about it. They like it too much. Anyway, two of these professional makeup jobs were being cried off towards the end of the dance, and, always fearful of middle school drama, Super Chaperone Miss Eyre went to investigate the situation.

"Everything okay?" I asked the two girls.

"Oh, nothing's wrong," one said tearfully. "I'm just sad that we're all leaving."

I looked out on the dance floor where kids were alternately dancing, hugging, and crying. So many of my students really are friends with just about everyone, and I know they really will miss each other. These weren't just crocodile tears.

"You know what, hon," I said, "if it makes you feel any better, I'm sad that you're all leaving too."

And with that, she passed me a tissue, too.

Here's a Quarter, Go Buy a Congressman

It's now common knowledge that Charter Schools tried to buy NY State Assembly candidate Steve Baher for $200,000.  200K here, and 200K there, and they own the entire legislature.  It's not enough to own Barack Obama and Andrew Cuomo.  After all, there's just so much the President can do to push their agenda.  If they had legislatures statewide they wouldn't need to pimp out Arne Duncan on his race to see how high cash-strapped states can jump. 

Is there anyone out there who really believes these hedge fund guys are worried about the welfare of our children?  More likely they're tired of paying taxes to support education.  After all, if the public school system were to collapse entirely there'd be no change whatsoever for the children of Michael Bloomberg, Joel Klein or Barack Obama.  They talk a lot about public schools, but you wouldn't catch their kids attending on a bet.

It's interesting they always act so concerned about the schools they long ago deemed not good enough for their children.   If we really wanted better public schools we'd mandate that people who control school systems send their own kids there.  Maybe then they'd find ways to devote the hundreds of million dollars NYC took to reduce class size to reducing class size.  Maybe instead of bashing unions, which have historically enabled a middle class, they'd be encouraging them.

Stranger things have happened.  But our political system is so thoroughly corrupt, our free press so incurious and one-sided that all we hear about is the one politician who didn't take the money.  Who knows how much it costs to buy Andrew Cuomo? How much is David Paterson?  Did they get a discount when he chose not to run again?  And how much was the President of the United States?

More importantly, what will it take to get politicians who represent we the people rather than merely they the hedge fund gazillionaires?

Dear Miss Eyre

No, I'm not starting an advice column. (Unless you want me to.) Rather, at this most wonderful time of the year (better than Christmas!), I'm reflecting on some of the missives I've received from my babies recently. What with the school year ending (and me working with a couple of kids to save them from gloom, doom, and summer school), I've gotten some very lovely words from the kids. My favorite goes something like this (I'm paraphrasing):

Dear Miss Eyre,

When the school year started, I was really scared! You seemed like you had a million rules and all these deadlines. You gave us that big packet with all the things we'd have to do all year in it. You seemed really organized but also really demanding.

I'll stop this letter here to say that thank GOD I was not in the presence of children when I read it, because I laughed and laughed aloud when I read that. ORGANIZED. A child called me ORGANIZED. Either this child is extremely diplomatic or has never actually looked at my desk once all year.

Anyway:

But it turned out that you helped us with everything. You always made us believe we could do it and made sure we were successful. Your classes were really fun and you were always energetic.

Oh, this poor deceived child. If only she knew how much coffee it takes to get me to that state sometimes.

Thank you for everything you did for us. Have a great summer! I'll miss you!

Love,

Jemima

**wipes away tears of laughter**

No, no, Jemima. Thank you.

Madam Randi Reveals All

In a recent op-ed in the Daily News, Michelle Rhee explained that, because she's "pro-kid," teachers should give up any and all job protections, trust their fate to the hands of demagogues like Michael Bloomberg and Joel Klein, and hope for the best.  Miss Rhee praised the visionary Randi Weingarten for giving away everything but the kitchen sink.

Ms. Weingarten responded with another op-ed, saying that DC had already given away a lot, and that her most recent deal did not actually give away all that stuff, since some of it had been given away earlier.

Ms. Weingarten's final foray into NY negotiation reversed one of the many odious provisions of her giveaway-laden 05 contract--the two August punishment days.  For this, Ms. Weingarten exchanged one day in June, .58 percent of a point of the raise Mayor Bloomberg is now denying us, and 3% of the salaries of all future hires for an additional seventeen years.  I certainly hope we derive maximum enjoyment from those August days.

Meanwhile, back here in NY, thousands of teachers are being excessed.  Older teachers would have been placed in positions before 05, but will now be dumped into the Absent Teacher Reserve, from which their chances of being hired are abysmal.  Rhee thinks, as does Klein, that they should be fired.  The fact that yet another Weingarten-approved measure forces principals to consider their salaries when hiring them is neither here nor there.

Ms. Weingarten lays out the differences between DC and NYC:

In Washington, the approach to education has been to flirt with fads and cure-alls. Instead of tackling systemic problems head-on, the city often has relied on a kind of magical thinking.

To Ms. Weingarten, this somehow represents a difference from NYC.  Ms. Weingarten, apparently, has forgotten mayoral control, which she repeatedly endorsed.  She's also forgotten her merit pay system, the one that isn't merit pay, which failed to influence student achievement.  She's also forgotten about the "lead teacher" position, the one that also didn't represent merit pay.  And perhaps she's forgotten the bull's eye painted on the ATRs, none of whom would be in that position if not for her specific approval.  Maybe no one has told her that the current UFT President just negotiated "value-added" to rate teachers--despite the fact that no research whatsoever supports its validity to do so.

Ms. Weingarten labels DC “a school culture defined by education fads and a complete lack of trust,” and seems to feel because of that, it's  somehow different from the school culture in NY.   Is there anyone reading this who doesn't think her description applies to NYC as well?

Ms. Weingarten is very good at noting what’s coming and embracing it early.  That's how she and her army of sycophants enabled the miserable 05 contract.  On the other hand, by that logic, death is coming too.    You can't stop it.  I can accept that.

Still,  I won't be stepping in front of a moving truck this morning.  I'll leave such moves in the capable hands of Ms. Weingarten and her ilk.

Thanks to David Bellel for the picture!

Presented Without Comment

Stolen from GothamSchools

Hands Off

Here's a story about a teacher who died after breaking up a fight.  It's not clear whether or not the fight was a direct cause.  Nonetheless, the result is the same.

As a fairly new teacher, I came up the stairs one day to find two girls fighting.  One girl appeared about to kill the other.  She was smaller, but on top of a larger girl.  When I came up she was alternately striking her and extracting clumps of hair from the larger girl's head.  I wasn't sure whether the girl on the bottom was even going to have a head much longer.

I tried to pull the smaller girl off the larger one.  Unfortunately, when I picked her up, the larger girl came up too.   A few feet away was a boy who looked like Mike Tyson.  He was looking at me and I asked him to help, but when he got to us, the smaller girl managed to kick him to the floor.  A minute later some security guards showed up and managed to pull the girls apart.   Mike Tyson Lite got up and dusted himself off, but wasn't really hurt.

I got called into the principal's office.  The principal introduced himself for the third or fourth time, and told me how he liked to meet the new teachers, for the third or fourth time.   He then explained that I should never get involved in a fight between students.  If I got hurt, he said, my health insurance wouldn't cover me.  I took him at his word and didn't get in between any more scuffles between students.

It seemed to me I was doing the right thing by not letting that girl get killed.  But what do I know?

Packing Up

Over at my own blog, I wrote a post about the experience of packing up my classroom. That post was a bit more rant-y, so this one is going to focus on some pointers for cleaning up, packing up, and getting out of Dodge.

I'm determined to not end up with a few boxes of indeterminate junk this year, so I'm being pretty ruthless about what I toss and give away. Student work gets put on a table for a few days and, if it's not claimed, it gets trashed. I hate throwing away kids' work--so depressing!--but keeping every piece of paper is just not practicable. My kids keep portfolios of projects and published writing pieces that get sent home on the last day of school, but around this time, garbage bags start piling up. If I want to save a couple of especially good projects as examples for next year, I ask the kids who made them first, then have them laminated and file them with the materials for that unit.

Taking down bulletin boards can be sad, too, even if you hate making bulletin boards like I do. They do look pretty, and they look desperate when totally naked (or covered with garbage bags so the backing paper and borders can be reused next year). Every year I ditch some charts and laminate others to save for next year.

I separated into boxes all the books that I, personally, provided for my classroom library this year through my own sweat, money, or both. I'm up to 6 boxes and still counting.

Kids leave things in classrooms all the time. I have a box in my room full of hoodies, baseball caps, umbrellas, even a basketball. I ask kids to check it every day. Whatever is left on the last day of school goes to Goodwill.

Before you throw away things like samples of textbooks, catalogs, posters, etc., ask around to your colleagues. They might be looking for the thing you're about to toss. Maybe your school has a point person to collect unwanted materials, or a central location to drop off items that are no longer needed so that everyone can paw through.

What are your favorite cleanup/packup tips for the end of the year?

What a Maroon! What an Ignoranamous!

That's what Bugs Bunny would say at the notion of kids coming back for a full school day on June 25th.  Supposedly it's to make up a snow day.  It was tragic that we had to close the schools for snow this year, but hey, IT WAS SNOWING!!!  It's a long and hallowed tradition that when every school in the area closes, because IT'S SNOWING, NYC schools stay open.  While in the suburbs, slippery streets are dangerous, people slip, people freeze, people die, it's a well-known fact that city kids and teachers are impervious to nature.

I know this well because in the burbs, where I live, my daughter often gets days off when I have to go in. While it's too dangerous for her school bus to cross town, it's fine for me to get on the LIE and hope for the best.  I remember one morning I was driving in, cars crashing to my left and right, and then-mayor Saint Rudy Giuliani was on the radio saying, "For God's sake, don't come to work today unless you really have to."  But he was my boss, and he was the same guy telling me to come to work.

I wrote his quote on the board for the handful of kids who showed up. 

In any case, if there are too many snow days in our district, they may schedule one during February or spring break.  I don't ever keep my kid out of school so we can go to Disneyland or something, but if we have a trip planned during a break, I don't cancel it so she can go to school one extra day.

But Joel Klein, in his infinite wisdom, has decreed that kids will return for a full school day June 25th.  It's likely Joel Klein has never taught a class of kids that's already taken all the tests, received all the grades, and seen all the consequences of their actions.  Personally, that's not a class I want to meet, even though they know me well enough not to mess with me.

More to the point, the overwhelming majority of those kids are simply not going to show up.  Some might say that this plan is the work of a petty, small-minded fussbudget.

And that's precisely the person the dimwitted, tone-deaf "reformers" think should decide the fate of teachers, regardless of seniority.

In conclusion, Bugs was right.

The TEA Party: Tested Enough Already

I've no great love for the TEA (Taxed Enough Already) movement. I'm all for fiscal responsibility, but too much of their rhetoric has a racist and social Darwinist undercurrent that I can't buy into. Not to mention that I find it perfectly appropriate that the extraordinarily fortunate should have to pay a great deal of taxes, and have never complained about my increasing tax bill; to me, that's a sign that, for better or worse, I'm making it in the U.S.A.

But administering the state's social studies assessment today made me think I could get behind a different TEA Party. It could stand for Tested Enough Already. Because, middle school humanities teachers like myself, do we know of a more useless and pointless test than the social studies test? Without getting the scores on the exam, which we don't, they don't really help to inform instruction. What this does other than help us kill 2 days at the end of the year is beyond me, particularly when left with a room of 30 hyper eighth graders for the rest of the day who are entirely uninterested in doing any more work.

I'm not totally anti-testing, not even anti-standardized testing. Testing can be helpful and tell us useful things. Being anti-testing is like being anti-rain or anti-fiber; sometimes things that are unpleasant on their surfaces do an awful lot of good a little down the road. But sometimes testing lacks a sense of purpose, or tests are used for the wrong things. That's when testing is unhelpful to the point of being counterproductive. I'm sure that today's test helped to kill some interest in history, which is of course a rich and rewarding subject and one that can be made accessible to even very resistant learners.

As always, I welcome your comments on testing, social studies, and tea.

Michael Bloomberg, Indispensible Financial Genius, Tosses 30 Million Tax Dollars in Trash

It's well known that Mayor Bloomberg's absolute mastery of finance necessitated tossing the term limits law, twice affirmed by voters, straight into the dumpster.  We couldn't possibly do without him, and the fact that his polls indicated he had no shot at the presidency in 2008 did not remotely influence his decision.  In yet another inspired decision, out of personal animosity, Mayor Bloomberg saw fit to withhold the lease of the family who'd run Tavern on the Green since 1974. 

Apparently, their 86 million dollar bid was not as attractive as the 57 million dollar bid the city accepted, by a gentleman who "made a lot of promises."  This, apparently, is important in the world of city politics.  Also, the finances of the woman who offered the 86 mil were questionable.  You have to take into question the character of the applicants, of course.

Oddly, Mayor Bloomberg's chosen candidate never managed to open the restaurant.  He was unable to come to an agreement with unionized employees.  It makes one wonder whether the inability to deal with unions is a prerequisite to doing business with the city nowadays.

It's odd that, under the concept "Race to the Top," Mayor Bloomberg's best bud Barack demeans and cheapens one of the most worthy and meaningful professions a person could aspire to, with neither research nor history to support his corporate-backed ideas.  Back home, Mayor Mike has managed to take a world-famous, world-class restaurant and turn it into a hot dog stand.

Which is precisely what the United States will be if we leave these autocrats to run it.  It's also where many of us could end up working if they aren't stopped, and soon.

Thanks to GC

Not to Be Missed

Accountable Talk analyzes Michelle Rhee's pile of boilerplate reform nonsense that appeared in the Daily News this morning.

America Welcomes the McGangBang

In the ever more competitive American quest to create the most atrocious fast food imaginable, this new entry seems to have an edge on the competition.  First of all, it only costs two dollars and sixteen cents.  Second, it's composed entirely of "food" from McDonald's.

In my wayward youth, I worked doing whatever needed doing at a beer distributor.   Across the street was a McDonald's, and I knew a girl who worked there. She used to stuff extra burgers and things into whatever I ordered.

After overdoing it two days in a row, I decided there was something off about McDonald's products.  Perhaps it's all made of plastic in different colors and shapes.  Or maybe it's something else.  Still, I haven't been able to eat there in decades and the very thought of it makes me ill.

Now, some creative genius has decided to take the double cheeseburger and stuff a "McChicken" sandwich in the center.  Looks tempting, doesn't it?

I wish you all a great weekend, and remember--the only thing better than going to McDonald's is not going to McDonald's.

Pure Joy

Here's something Joel Klein doesn't understand, will never understand, and will never experience.

I have a girl in my afternoon class who I fight with all the time. 

"You are a troublemaker,"  I tell her.  "I don't like troublemakers."

She doesn't care at all.  "YOU are a troublemaker," she says.

"Oh, you call your English teacher a troublemaker?  How could you?"

"Because it's TRUE.  Ask anybody."

We've had a hundred similar conversations.  The other day, I looked around the room at these kids.

"You are a great class," I told them.  I'm really going to miss you."

"You are a great teacher," the girl said.  "I will really miss your class."

It's the first nice thing she's said to me all year.   But I treasure it.   To have someone as smart as she is give such a great compliment--it means a lot.

It made my day, anyway.

Happy Brooklyn-Queens Day!

Top of the morning and happy Brooklyn-Queens Day to you! As a non-native of NYC who is always curious to learn more about some of the city's peculiar and beloved institutions, Brooklyn-Queens Day is a favorite topic of mine. Originally celebrated as "Rally Day" to celebrate (really) Sunday schools, it became Anniversary Day and later Brooklyn-Queens Day, on which we commemorate the joining of Brooklyn and Queens with New York City proper. (These tidbits courtesy Welcome to Brooklyn.) These days, Brooklyn-Queens Day is also a Chancellor's Conference Day, on which the kiddies stay home and we go to school.

My dollbabies will undoubtedly be celebrating by sleeping late; catching up on Degrassi, Maury Povich, and Call of Duty: Modern Warfare; and, I hope to God, finishing their social studies exit projects. Somehow I doubt that any of them will be commemorating the vital role that Sunday School, Brooklyn, or Queens has played in their lives. I suppose that's all right. If I were at home, I probably wouldn't be doing any of those things either.

I will be at school, maybe doing some collaborative work with my colleagues but probably listening to a consultant read a PowerPoint out loud to me. This is how Chancellor's Conference Days tend to go. Every year I'm tempted to start up a game of Bullshit Bingo, but by the time the day rolls around, I'm usually feeling less than puckish.

The only nice thing about this Chancellor's Conference Day is that summer is right around the corner. I know it doesn't feel like it, but it is. Check your calendar. It's coming.

Has Paterson Come to His Senses?

In the long run, probably not.  But his latest emergency budget includes no cuts to education.  That's significant for those of us who spend time reading the tea leaves, but it's likely he'll opt in the end to screw the kids, screw the teachers, and screw working people.  That's kind of the attitude here where 30 billion for Afghanistan is a given, but 23 to save teacher jobs is a boondoggle.

Let's hope he wakes up in the middle of the night to see the ghost of Education Past rattling chains and asking him how the hell kids are going to learn without teachers.  Let's hope he figures, what do I have to lose?  Then maybe he'll do the right thing.

I really would like to see a politician do the right thing.  I used to think people who voted for Ralph Nader were out of their minds.  Now I think they just wised up before I did.

Well, fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, I can't get fooled again.

Didn't make a whole lot of sense when GW said it.  For some reason, it seems to apply here.

Partial Credit: Pros and Cons

Yesterday a colleague and I were discussing the article in the Post that "revealed" what I imagine most teachers knew already: wrong answers to math questions on state exams can be given partial credit if a student can show that he or she arrived at the wrong answer with at least some understanding of how to get the right answer. The "shocked, shocked" reaction of so many folks to that article confused me. I don't teach math, but I teach another subject (social studies) that, despite having clearly right or wrong answers to questions, can allow for partial credit.

Over at GothamSchools, the news is not so much the article itself but the thoughtful commentary. Commenter bronxmathteacher offers a reasoned defense of granting partial credit, particularly in math, with which I agree. In order to give kids credit for critical thinking and closely assessing where they are in mathematical development, it makes sense to recognize progress, even if the "computation," as bronxmathteacher puts it, is not all there.

The problem, as this individual correctly points out, is the politicization of the test scores. Students who would not have taken the Regents before are taking them now, and while many of those students are benefiting from increased opportunity and higher expectations, some of those students are not equipped to take the test. That's not so much a problem in and of itself, but when the "cut scores" (the minimum number of points required to pass) are made very low, what you end up with is a dumbed-down test and pass rates that mean little when students can get few answers actually correct and still pass the test. Then, the pass rates are used to inflate graduation rates and other statistics. Looks good on paper, but not much, if anything, has changed for those kids.

As a non-math teacher, I don't read or understand much about teaching math. But this post was crystal clear to me, and it concerned me.

Klein Meets With Hired Thugs

That's a pretty catchy headline.  I think it's about as accurate as this one:

Klein celebrates no layoffs, hits the bar with young teachers

That appeared in GothamSchools a few days ago.   Not only did it suggest no layoffs, but it appeared under the heading "Bullet Dodged."  In all fairness, the reporter had no way of knowing Mayor Bloomberg had misled the public about his layoff intentions.   Even though he'd lied in the past, even though he'd called revoking term limits "disgusting" before having them revoked,  even though he'd blatantly violated the Taylor Law by unilaterally announcing the terms of a contract without specifically mandated negotiation, there was truly no way for the Gotham reporter to know just how disingenuous he was being at that particular moment.

In fact, no less than the New York Times had just praised Mayor Bloomberg for making a "sensible choice."  They had no issue with his flagrant disregard for law, and their headline read "Jobs Saved: 4400."   If the venerable New York Times, with all its resources, couldn't determine Bloomberg would change his mind three days later, how would one single reporter from GothamSchools figure it out?

However, the Gotham headline was still shocking--it conjured images of the Chancellor getting to know teachers. I found this hard to accept, as his years of vilifying us and our unions suggest he hates us and everything we stand for. 

The article went on to point out that actually he was meeting a more selective group, "Educators 4 Excellence," some young teachers who specifically want senior teachers fired, on the premise that they may not be as good as new teachers.  These teachers appear to trust the judgment of serial liars Klein and Bloomberg to make these determinations.   Or perhaps they simply assume their asses will be covered if seniority goes down the tubes.

They have good reason to believe they'd survive non-seniority-based layoffs--Klein went and specifically praised one of them for going to the Grand Canyon, so you know they wouldn't feel the wrath of their new drinking buddy.  (Perhaps when they become older, if their activism subjects them to being fired at the whims of autocrats like Bloomberg and Klein, they won't have families to support, they won't need health insurance, and they won't have bills to pay, so it won't matter al all.)

The thing that really gave me pause was the "point of clarification" at the end of the piece.  "Clarification" is a funny word.  I always remember Mayor Bloomberg, after having promised to get rid of trailers by 2012, then clarifying to say he would not get rid of trailers.  This "clarification" explained while this faux-grassroots group was called "entirely unfunded," its website was actually paid for by Education Reform Now, the same front group that funded the faux-grassroots commercials urging people not to listen to the teachers' union.  The English teacher in me suggests the word "correction" is more in order.  (Sharp Miss Eyre, on simply seeing the website, suggested they had extra funding months ago.)

The group's co-founder attempts to change the subject by saying he paid for the party himself.  This, of course, comes well after it was falsely reported to be "entirely unfunded," and I've seen no previous attempt on the part of this individual to make that correction publicly.  So--was Gotham misled by the fake-grassroots group?  Or was the reporter simply making an assumption based on the info the fake-grassroots group failed to report? 

In any case, after that admission, far more newsworthy than the cutesy headline, comes this:

Stone told me today that he and Morris have only begun to look for outside funding for the group...

It's kind of incredible, after having specifically revealed that the group had already received outside funding, that anyone could seriously entertain the notion it had "only begun" to look for it, let alone report it with no hint of irony.  Even more incredible is the notion that this group, sitting there with uber-"reformer" Joel Klein, would have to struggle in any way whatsoever to get funding.  What with the hedge-fund managers that have already funded them, it's not very tough to figure out where more money will come from.  Plenty of billionaires and hedge fund managers are ready and willing to throw money at causes that weaken union and hurt working people.

If you want to see a real grassroots group, take a look at GEM.  Agree with them or not, but they are upfront with their agenda, and have no hedge fund managers pulling their strings. When's the last time you saw a feature about GEM anywhere?  Personally, I'd like to see one at the New York Times, at GothamSchools, and everywhere else, and soon.

As for my headline, these teachers may not be thugs.  But they're most certainly doing the bidding of moneyed interests, whatever else they may believe.

How Mayor Bloomberg Puts Children First--He Fires their Teachers, Breaking Yet Another Promise

Actually, first he threatened to fire 4400 teachers.  Then he unilaterally declared neither teachers nor supervisors would get raises for two years, blatantly violating the Taylor Law, and promised no teacher layoffs as a result.   This move was praised by the "liberal" New York Times. 

Bloomberg also violated NYC's prime directive of pattern bargaining no matter what.  Apparently, when the pattern is not a piece of crap, it's not important to maintain it.  Finally, after doing all that, he says he may just fire the teachers anyway.

Because it's his city, he's the mayor, and he can do what the hell he wants.

Over the last few weeks we've given him the rubber room agreement, the new rating plan, and the raising of the charter cap.  As far as I can tell, we've gotten absolutely nothing in return.

Except this, of course.

A Fly on the Wall

Hey Mike.

How’s by you, Mike?

Sorry I had ta say all that stuff about the teachers.  I know you probably didn’t wanna hear it.

That’s OK.  Don’t worry about it.  It’s a long ride to Albany and I don’t wanna argue.

So, our deal is still on, right?

Sure.

So we’ll let ‘em stew in it for a while, then come back with 2.

That’ll be fine.

But only up to the first 70K, right?

We’ll figure that out later.   Let's enjoy the ride for now.  Whatever happens, we can blame the governor for everything.

What if your members don’t go for it?

The members?  Don’t worry, they’ll go for anything.

Are you sure?  Because I don’t wanna dig any deeper.  I hadda give everyone else 4.  That's the pattern, and we've never broken it before.

Look, we’ll tell them we were gonna get zero.  After a while, 2 will look good. I'll be a hero.

OK, if you’re sure.

No sweat.  I'm telling you, the members will vote for anything.

Schadenfreude; Or, So You're Not Getting Laid Off After All: You Suck

Well, I guess I have to cancel my twelve-month plan for writing my memoirs, because we're not getting laid off after all. That's undoubtedly good news for everyone involved. But of course, our laugh-a-minute Fearless Leader issued this proclamation in the same breath as he announced that we would not even see pattern raises. Most of my colleagues are pretty un-psyched about that part. I can see their point. Everyone likes more money. But since even the most ardent defenders of raises can't seem to figure out where the money would come from, I started telling myself quite a while back that I'd probably have to forget about seeing a raise. So I met today's news with relief, followed quickly by "meh." If they keep paying me, I'll keep showing up. I wish I made more money, sure, but it looks like it isn't going to happen for now, and it seems like there might be a good reason for that; namely, there is no frackin' money. Fine. I'll still sleep okay tonight.

What I don't get is the suggestion that teachers already have it so good that we ought to be ashamed of wanting more. Or maybe it's not quite that; that argument is hardly new. Maybe it's more like, "Well, my job in the private sector sucks! I haven't had a raise in three years SO YOU SHOULDN'T EITHER."

I don't quite buy that. It's not that I don't think public employees should have to sacrifice, exactly. But quite a few public employees have already sacrificed merely by being public employees. I don't know that there are many six-figure literary analysis jobs out there for me, granted, but a friend of mine is about to make close to it teaching TESOL classes in a Korean graduate school, and I have other friends who gave up well-paying jobs in accounting and law to become teachers. Teachers don't teach because of the money; if we wanted to make lots of money, we could probably make it elsewhere. We teach because we like it. And because we sacrifice higher earnings right out of the gate, we expect certain things in return: a higher degree of job security, better benefits. That doesn't seem crazy to me.

But besides that, I don't quite get the schadenfreude that people express against teachers. Like us not getting a raise would make them feel better or somehow improve their situation, like because their job sucks, ours should too. I mean, I have students who have deceased parents and incarcerated siblings, and that's horrible for them, but it wouldn't make any difference for them if their tablemates' brothers also went to jail in some crazy solidarity move.

So, okay, we teachers get it. We know what's been happening out in the private sector and most of us are angry about it. But, speaking for myself, I don't understand how acceding to the idea that jobs should be temporary, insecure, and paid at the bare minimum rate of salary and benefits is good for anyone--public or private, white or blue collar, whatever. I'm not sure how teachers giving ground on the ideas of reasonable job security and fair compensation helps anyone. Corporate America has turned their back on those ideas. That doesn't mean the rest of us should too.

Chutzpah

Every self-respecting New Yorker knows that’s when you murder your parents and plead mercy because you’re an orphan.  However, setting yourself up for a third term after voters twice affirmed your limit to two qualifies.  Also, announcing a settled union contract without bothering to negotiate with said union is up there.

Let’s review--Chancellor Klein and Mayor Bloomberg, after having set a pattern of 4% raises for two years, first suggested a raise of 2% up to the first  $70,000 teachers earn, thus giving those at maximum 1.4%.   I found this kind of outrageous, since whenever the pattern was unattractive, not only the city, but PERB as well, insisted we take it.

Not only that, but PERB insisted we give back in order to approach parity with neighboring districts.  So we gave back.  We gave up seniority transfers.  Now, when Joel Klein closes a school, teachers have to look for jobs.  And what with the innovation of making buildings pay individual salaries, it’s very tough for senior teachers to find work.  What principal wants a 100K teacher when he can buy two shiny new ones and get a big-screen TV for his office with the change.

Also, since 2005, teachers patrol lunchrooms, dodge flying cheeseburgers, and mediate food fights between disparate factions of sophomore malcontents.  I remember once reading a column in the Times about the secret value of lunchroom duty.  Let me tell you, I’ve done it, and in a school of 4,000 plus you rarely encounter your own students, you rarely have those valuable heart-to-hearts, and only someone who’s never done the job would delude himself into imagining it was of any value.  Lunch patrol is the single most unrewarding task I’ve performed in 25 years as a teacher.  The value of lunchroom duty is a deep, deep secret, and no teacher I’ve ever spoken with has ever managed to penetrate it.

We also gave back the right to grieve letters in our file.  For example, if an English teacher is accused of stealing pencils, she can no longer be defended on the mere basis she did not steal the pencils in question.  You’d think that no one, in this day and age, would get a letter in her file for having stolen pencils that, for all we know, are sitting in the supervisor’s desk under a box of tissues.  You’d be wrong.

Thousands of teachers sit for not 30, not 40, but for 37.5 minutes a day giving “small group instruction.”  This is something that’s not exactly a class, as no grades are given, but it’s going on all over the city.   Perhaps Tweed feels that compensates for our having the largest class sizes in the state.  I don’t know.  But that’s one of the things we gave to get a compensation increase a few points above the pattern in 2002, and then 2005.

So, Mayor Bloomberg, if you’re reading this, know that I’m with you.  I’ll take a zero for the common good.  That’s the kind of guy I am.  However, PERB declared pattern bargaining was sacrosanct, and who am I to question their wisdom? 

So here’s the deal, Mr. Mayor.  You take back all the things we gave you in 2005, and 2002, and we’ll agree to the zeroes.  We are reasonable people.  We’re willing to negotiate.

Are you?

Gym? We Don't Need No Stinking Gym!

Boy, it sure is inconvenient to run around that track.  And those parallel bars?  Who the hell even knows how those things work?  So the folks at the New Design School on the lower east side have worked out a better idea.  Have the kids sell popcorn at a film festival!

After all, when you sell popcorn, it's not the same as when you eat popcorn.  Therefore you won't be gaining calories.  You'll be gaining money for the school.  Or for the festival.  Or for someone.

And really, if kids are making money for someone, who really cares whether or not they're getting fit, or learning anything.  Since much of the all-important "reforms" revolve around degrading one of the few great jobs left in these United States, why not simply prepare kids for a life of servitude completing menial tasks that enrich others?

Because isn't that what education is really about here in Mayor Bloomberg's New York?

As an added bonus for those of you who wish to follow the New Design School regimen, here are a few tips from classic exercise guru Johny LaRue to get you started:




Thanks to AS

Summer Vacation or Funemployment?: Miss Eyre Ponders

Well, in a few short days, pink slips are going out. Or maybe not. Who the hell knows? Certainly not some chapter leaders, who are advising their members that all teachers with less than seven years in the system are being laid off. This sounded like absolute nonsense when I first heard it, and I was glad when a trusted colleague told me that it was indeed not the way things are going to work.

Nevertheless, at least the threat of layoffs remains. I don't know how afraid I should be. The contract doesn't tell me much. I'm not brand-new, but I'm near the bottom of my school's seniority list. I have no idea where I stand in terms of citywide seniority. I figure I should at least not book my summer vacation until Friday. Other than that, though, I don't know, and no one else seems to know either.

I have to admit that, since I became a teacher, I never ever considered getting laid off. For one thing, in my first miserable year or two, if anyone suggested that they wanted my job, I would have laughed in their face and let them have it. Then, once I grew to actually like my job and not suck at it, it just never occurred to me. My classes are at or near contractual maximum. My school is at capacity and other schools nearby are over theirs. Layoffs? That's what happens when there isn't enough work to go around. Over at the Morton School, the kiddies aren't teaching themselves, and there are a lot of them.

So at the end of this three-day weekend, I have to admit that I'm still a little confused about what's going to happen when and if the layoffs actually transpire. Will the ATRs land back in classrooms? Will my summer vacation stretch out into one long span of funemployment, since I have no idea what I would do if I wasn't teaching? I'd come up with something, I suppose, but, perhaps without even realizing it, I came to believe that I'd be teaching forever.

And, most obviously, what happens to the kids with several thousand fewer teachers? You don't have to tell me, really; I imagine we're talking, basically, larger class sizes and fewer "extras" (that aren't really "extras"). I suppose I'm still shocked that this doesn't seem like more of a priority, that families don't seem outraged, that lawmakers aren't working around the clock to avoid it.

It's going to be a long week. Fortunately, we're now less than 4 weeks away from summer vacation. (Or funemployment.)