"Failed" Presidency

Two months ago, President Barack Obama was hailed as a genius/savior who was going to clean up the mess created by the previous administration, the previous Congresses and the crooks on Wall Street and take us to a new era of post-partisanship and pragmatism where we all could live in golden-hued harmony.

That was then, this is now. After just 60 days in office, the Obama presidency is already being declared a "failure" by many on a suddenly emboldened right and even some on the left.

As job losses have accelerated and the financial markets have plummeted to 25 year lows (though they have picked up some since then), criticism of Obama and his team has mounted. The bailouts of the banks have created a huge populist backlash (though many criticizing the bailouts seemed to be just fine with them when it was Hank Paulson and George Bush doling out the bonus money to AIG, BoA, Citigroup and the like) and the AIG bonus money furor has people wondering just what President Merit Pay and his Treasury team were thinking when they okayed TARP money for bonuses.

Ordinarily I would say the criticism from the right is plain hypocrisy and start looking for instances in the past when the Eric Cantors and James Inhofes went on record saying it's socialism to have the government limit executive compensation even when those same executives work for companies that have lost hundreds of billions of dollars and have needed government money to survive. And believe me, a 15 second Google search will bring those quotes up for you lickety split.

But frankly, I've had with President Merit Pay and his administration too. The tone deafness over the AIG bonuses is just the latest example of why the supposedly "liberal" Obama is at core little different from the "conservative" he replaced.

Here are the latest examples:

On education, president Merit Pay wants to set up a bonus compensation system quite similar to Wall Street's in order to "reform" education. How'd that work on Wall Street, Bam?

On health care, after saying he wouldn't tax people who already have health care benefits to pay for people who don't, the administration has reversed course and said they are open to exactly that if that's what they need to do to get health care passed. How's that for taking care of the working and middle classes?

On the bailout, this president and his clueless Secretary of the Treasury have handed out as much or more free money to failed financial institutions and Wall Street crooks as the previous preznut and his crooked ex-Goldman employee who ran the Treasury Department under him. If Obama had wanted to stop bonuses like the ones paid out to AIG, he could have done so as soon as he stepped into the office. But he didn't make any such executive order. The argument people in the Treasury Department are making in defense of this policy is that they're more focused on preventing a financial meltdown then saving a few billion in bonus money. That defense is ludicrous on the face of it. If this is how the system is set up, maybe we NEED it to melt down - for too long, the crooks and predators in the financial sector have been excessively compensated for doing nothing more than pushing paper around and finding new ways to con people out of their money (and it would have been worse if they had gotten their Social Security reform - reform which President Merit Pay is open to, btw.) We need reform of the entire financial system and keeping with the status quo on compensation sure doesn't engender me with confidence that Treasury Timmeh or President Merit Pay intend to ever take that on.

On the economy, the stimulus bill was horrendous. Where was the money to fix infrastructure, to rebuild roads and bridges and trains and subways? Very little went to such projects and as I take my overcrowded Metro North train in every morning and switch to an even more crowded shuttle train to the West Side to wait for an even more crowded 1 train downtown, I can tell you that I curse the president, the Democratic-led Congress and the scumbags in the Republican Party who ran things for most of the previous eight years for squandering trillions of dollars on bull#$%^ while I take 19th century transportation to work in my 19th century school building. We have fought two wars on the nation's credit card, have added trillions to the national debt and what do we have to show for it? We have no national health care system, the country's infrastructure is falling to pieces, the ports and nuclear facilities remain unsafe and the electronic grid is one thunder storm away from being put out of commission. Welcome to Third World America, everybody! Reagan/Bush-created Clinton/Obama-approved.

Furthermore, the Federal Reserve's plan to reinflate us out of the current economic malaise is going to be a disaster in the years to come. With the trillions of dollars Uncle Ben and President Merit Pay are printing and handing out in bailout money and in buying up "toxic assets" from bank balance sheets, we are looking at 70's style inflation in the coming years that will take whatever money you have left in your 401(k) plan after the bastards at Goldman and AIG looted it and render it worthless. Dunno why Bam seems so intent on sacrificing himself for the sake of these Wall Street fat cats who despise him as a "socialist" (even as the only socialism he is engaging in is providing taxpayer-compensation for them so they can continue to live as Masters of the Universe...) But that's what he's doing with his current fiscal and economic policies. Guarantee you that America is going to REAM him when inflation hits double digits and some Paul Volker has to be brought in to the Fed to raise interest rates to 19% to tame the inflationary dragon.

I know it's only 60 days in. I never expected Merit Pay to clean things up in 60 days. But the tone coming from him and his people, the education, health care, bailout, Federal Reserve and war policies his administration is pursuing, the arrogance with which Merit Pay dismisses the criticism as "Simon Cowellesque," makes me think President Merit Pay just doesn't get it. I know people on the right like to tar him as a "socialist" and people on the left want to see him as one of their own. But after watching him during the campaign and now seeing how he has run the first 60 days, all I see is a guy who wants to triangulate between both sides on every issue, and while he may think he is being pragmatic and post-partisan, it sure seems like he is setting himself, his administration and the country up for failure.

I'm not quite ready to declare him a "failed" president yet. But another couple of weeks like the last few and I will be. As will lots of other Americans. His poll numbers are now down to the high 50's and falling fast. So is confidence in him. And you know what will happen once he falls below 50% - the sharks in Washington and the media establishment will have a feast.

To be frank, maybe they should.

Maybe we need to have both the GOP and the Democratic Party implode and find some alternatives to the current crooks running things. People in both of these parties enabled the last 25 years of crookery and if you look to see who the Bernie Madoffs and the Sir Alan Stanfords gave money to in DC, you'll see Charlie Rangel and Chuck Schumer on the same list as Phil Gramm and George Bush.

And there, I think, is the problem we have, no matter who is in office. They're all crooks, all beholden to the same moneyed interests.

Meet the new bosses, same as the old bosses.

Unmotivated Kids?

Why not get them involved in steel cage fights? There's more to life than just reading Moby Dick, ya know.

Mike Klonsky on Charters

Interesting talk at Small Talk.

More Expert Analysis from Jay Matthews

It's only recently that I started reading Jay Matthews, as he doesn't write for a local paper, but I must give him credit, as he actually gets paid for writing this stuff. His most recent column discusses the woes of two KIPP schools on opposite coasts.

Now out in California, a KIPP principal was accused of outrageous abuse:

.. slamming students against the wall, placing trash cans over their heads, forcing kids to crawl on their hands and knees while barking, and enforcing unreasonably strict bathroom rules, resulting in students having accidents and vomiting on themselves inside the classroom.

I can certainly understand how something like that might upset people. But the principal resigned, and KIPP moved on.

Here's where it gets interesting. What outrage, according to Jay, started the turmoil at the NY KIPP? The teachers tried to form a union. Without blinking an eye, Jay Matthews continues, effectively classifiying unionization as an outrage tantamount to child abuse.

And what is the resolution here? Well, at least one of the teachers requesting they unionize has backed off, and perhaps more will follow. So KIPP can perhaps breathe a sigh of relief.

They should be thankful they have free cheerleaders like Jay Matthews, who print such outrageous bilge. Not so fortunate are your children and mine, who may grow up in a world where such sleazy vilification of united working people is taken for granted.

5 Million Bucks...

...to repair Mayor Bloomberg's office. Why can't they just push a trailer out back? It's been good enough for my students for over ten years.

Great Expectations

Jonathan didn't show up for my test two weeks ago. This wasn't very unusual for him. He'd missed several last semester, and tended to disappear for several days at a time. In fact, when the Regents exam came last January, Jonathan didn't even bother showing up. This may have helped my stats a little, as I did not expect him to pass. After all, while most of my kids were writing till their hands bled, he was off attending to more urgent matters.

Yesterday I had someone who speaks Jonathan's language call his house, and waddya know, he showed up today. He had a good reason for being absent, he said, and he would tell me after class. No need for that, I told him, and invited him into my office, which was directly outside the trailer. Jonathan told me he'd been having family troubles, and that I could ask the teacher who called his house. She'd set me straight. I told Jonathan that, given his track record, I didn't believe him. I also told him it didn't really matter whether or not he was telling the truth. He was out, he did no work, and he was failing.

I did check out his story, though. The teacher told me his stepmom had come home to find Jonathan en flagrante with his girlfriend, at a most inconvenient moment. I'll spare you the details, but alas, Jonathan was grounded forever, at least. He was only allowed out to come to school. So why, then, wasn't he showing up? This surprised the calling teacher, who said things had now taken an entirely new direction.

As I went around checking kids' work, I observed his blank paper and complimented him for making no mistakes. My student teacher, however, spent a good deal of time helping him. She told me what a nice kid he was, which is true actually. Hopefully she's right and I'm wrong. Perhaps tomorrow he'll have actually accomplished something.

I'm not holding my breath, though.

Let's Privatize!

The problem with public schools, I've been reading for years, is that there's no accountability. If the school fails, it just goes on forever failing. That's simply not acceptable, say the privatizers. In the real world, when a business fails, it closes. So why shouldn't the same apply to public schools? Of course, that was before the US Government got into the business of massive bailouts, so that AIG execs wouldn't miss out on their bonuses this year.

In any case, in came Mayor Michael Bloomberg, and he began closing public schools right and left. If your school is failing, it closes. That's the way of the real world (or the way it used to be, perhaps). We'll reopen with five new academies, and they'll have all new kids, fewer ESL and special ed. kids, and we'll compare the one that does best with the big school we just closed. Does that make a good 30-second soundbyte or what? Keep it going, New York. Where did the kids who went to the big school end up? Who knows? Who cares?

So if schools fail, they have to be closed. That's the law. Unless they're private religious schools, which must be saved. After all, everyone knows they're much better than neighborhood schools, which are completely worthless. After all, who judges a neighborhood by its schools? It's much better to close them forever than fix them. Anyway, religious schools have much better teachers, who control the kids much more effectively.

This has nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that their population has 100% proactive parents, willing to pay for their kids' private education, and nothing whatsoever to do with the lack of restriction they have with discipline, up to and including expulsion. Certainly religious school teachers could walk into public schools and control the most difficult problem children without breaking a sweat.

So Mayor Bloomberg not only wants to turn a bunch of religious schools into charters, he wants to guarantee currently enrolled kids slots in them. This is because, of course, charter schools always select kids by a totally fair lottery (except when they don't). But that's not the only problem with these conversions. While the Catholic schools can take down the crosses and remove overt religious instruction, there are some nasty laws to consider:

For example, the law bars the conversion of any existing private schools -- including religious schools -- into charters. While Bloomberg said that all students now enrolled in the Catholic schools would be guaranteed admission to the new charters, the law mandates that all admission to charters be by lottery -- meaning no one can be assured of a slot. The law calls for 70 percent of all teachers at charters to be certified -- a requirement many Catholic schools do not meet.

So let's see--you can't legally turn religious schools into charters, you can't enroll anyone you feel like in a charter, and you can't actually hire just anyone to teach children. But that won't stop Mayor Mike. After all, NYC voters twice insisted on term limits, and Mayor Mike told the voters in no uncertain terms where they could stick it. If he doesn't have to follow the twice-told will of the people, why should any stinking law apply to him?

And the best part is this--if he fails, he can say, you see? I was fighting for the rights of the common folk to go to private school for free. So what if I closed a bunch of neighborhood schools instead of fixing them? You don't think all kids are gonna get the small class sizes Green Dot schools get, do you? How on earth would I be able to keep closing them if I squandered potential stadium funds on things like reasonable class sizes, decent facilities, or buildings instead of trailers?

How on earth are people like Eva Moskowitz gonna profit if I keep public schools public? Who needs neighborhood schools when you could take a crap shoot at getting your kid in a charter where teachers aren't unionized, work 200 hours a week, and have no job security? Then, one day your kids will get a crap shoot at jobs that aren't unionized, work 200 hours a week and have no security.

It all fits perfectly.

Happy St. Patty's Day

A guy walks into a bar in Cork City, and asks the bartender, "What's the fastest way to get to Dublin?"

"Are you walking or driving?" asks the bartender.

"Driving," says the guy.

"That's the fastest way," says the bartender.

That's All I Can Stands, and I Can't Stands No More

Day to day life for public school teachers is something few people know about. Sure, the op-ed writers say we're overpaid, we're underworked, and our unions need to be broken, but let one of them take an 80% pay cut and try controlling 34 teenagers at a time. And it's not the kids who cause some of the most egregious problems. I wrote before about finding my trailer's desk filled with fast food, and about how two of the three drawers were pretty much ruined, being highly sticky from the Coca-Cola that had been spilled in them.

One day last week, I discovered someone had thrown an ice cream party in my trailer. It did not require much detective work, as the desktop had been covered with ice cream and someone had taken the time to stick several paper plates to the stuff. The plates were festively placed over the desktop, giving it a polka-dot theme.

Now I don't much use the desk. I usually dump my bag on it, take attendance, and leave extra books in the one drawer that wasn't sabatoged. After that, I leave the desk alone and it leaves me alone. At least that's been our understanding. But since the desktop was no longer usable, I removed the drawer with supplies, enlisted a hearty kid to help, and carried the useless desk outside the trailer. After all, it wasn't like there were paper towels or anything in the trailer bathroom to clean up.

So there it sat, till a couple of custodians came by asking why no one had told them the desk was out there. They had brought a dolly, and asked if they could take the desk. I told them they could do what they pleased with it. They asked if I wanted another desk, and I said sure, that would be great.

But so far, there isn't one. And over the weekend, someone removed the last drawer, along with all the books and supplies that were in it. I don't really need the desk.

But I really wonder what would happen if someone did this to "reformers" like Joel Klein. Or Al Sharpton. Or Michelle Rhee.

Or Barack Obama.

You never hear them complain about this stuff.

The Holy Grail

As everyone knows, kids grow all the time, and are always demanding that we accommodate their unexpected bodily changes with things like food and clothing. When my daughter was very young, I made egregious errors like buying her 50-dollar shoes at Stride-Rite, only to replace them 45 minutes later. I always wondered what made people shop at Payless Shoes, but that made me learn fast.

Nonetheless, when they get older, they become more aware, and ask troublesome questions like, "Why are my shoes made of plastic and held together with duct tape, Daddy?" And at a certain age, you can't just smile and offer them a piece of gum. These darn kids get smarter all the time, and there are few things more inconvenient than that.

My daughter's recently become aware that the coolest thing in the world is a North Face parka. As they cost 300 bucks, and as she's still growing, I told her forget it. But my wife, who is not a miserable cold-hearted teacher like me, took pity on her. She was in Macy's the other day, with a bunch of coupons, and as it's the end of the season, managed to find one for 140 bucks. And as she and my daughter are now about the same size, she figured she could take it if my daughter grew out of it.

It seemed to make a lot of sense. The coat was really warm, and in a forest green color, it looked great. But everything is point of view. My daughter looked at it, and said, "I want a black one." Because everyone has a black one. And my wife gave me an imploring look.

This weekend I worked in Delaware, brought my family with me, and my Nuvi GPS kindly alerted me every time we passed a Macy's. Some have the coats, and some don't. In Cherry Hill, New Jersey, there were tons of them at 50% off. But they were all in size large or larger. I tried one on, and it seemed to be the warmest jacket I'd ever put on. Also, it was gray, not black. That was good for me, because I didn't want to look like the kids. So my wife pulled out her astonishingly impressive collection of Macy's coupons and we got it for a very good price.

Alas, my daughter was forlorn and dejected. The salesman claimed his Asian customers had bought all the small sizes. In the women's section, all that was left were a couple of North Face sweaters and a bunch of gloves. It was a sad situation indeed. Would my poor daughter be able to deal with the indignity of wearing a coat in the wrong color?

I guess if I were a good parent, I'd have sprung for the obligatory 300 bucks back in November, when black North Face parkas were springing up like weeds. Perhaps it would have been a bargain. After all, one day she may have to pay thousands for therapy to deal with the reality of her miserable abusive parents.

Hopefully, by then we'll have made some progress with health care.

Merit Pay

Run a company into the ground, have taxpayers bail you out to the tune of 170 billion, then score 165 million in bonuses.

A Question

Over at Edwize, they've seen fit to post an ad seeking teachers for the Green Dot NY charter. I've posted a few questions, which they may or may not publish. In any case, I'm posting them here.

Hmmm...I have a few questions about this. "Come join the Green Dot New York Charter School and help lead the effort to transform public education to ensure that all children receive the education they need to fulfill their dreams!"

Is this to imply that teachers like me, who work under miserable conditions in overcrowded schools with inadequate facilities, perhaps because valuable resources go to charter schools, are not trying to ensure kids get what kids need to fulfill their dreams?

Wouldn't it be easier if we got the facilities to help them, rather than turning them over to charter schools? Shouldn't our union help us to get those facilities?

Also, Green Dot's website declares its teachers have neither tenure nor seniority rights. Do you think that's a good thing for working teachers? I understand that Edwize has declared their "just cause" provisions are superior to tenure, but it's quite clear Green Dot means to say something else altogether. In fact, Steve Barr declared on Eduwonk that teachers gladly dump tenure to work for him.

In any case, how many times, if ever, has Green Dot's "just cause" provision been tested? If it has, how many teacher positions has it saved? Thanks for your reply. Since you're running this ad on our dues-supported website, it behooves you to let us know what we're getting into.

Thanks in advance for the info.

Of course, I eagerly await their reply.

Q and A

Q: What do you call a person who graduates at the bottom of the medical school class?

A: Doctor.

Q: Why was astrology invented?

A: So economics would look like a science.

Curses!

On Wednesday, my ace student Maria asked if she could sit in the back of the room to take a test. I said sure, as I'm such a swell guy. Maria wrote her essay in record time, and it really wasn't good at all. But boy, did she get it done quickly. She clearly had something of more importance to get to.

My student teacher, who observes this class, later told me Maria was texting someone back there, and that she'd instructed her to stop. Maria obligingly put away the offending cell phone, only to draw it out a few minutes later. Now the second time it came out, the student teacher was wary of confrontation. Really, she gets paid not one dime, and for that, why should she have to fuss and fight with uncooperative kids who don't listen anyway? After all, isn't that my job?

Well it is, of course. But she didn't relay this story to me until after class, when Maria had already gone her merry way. I regretted not confiscating the phone, which I'd certainly have done if I'd only known about it in time. But I was pretty sure Maria would ask to sit in the back again, and then she'd feel the wrath of a highly uncooperative NYC Educator, in front of whom she'd be sitting for the rest of her natural life, if not longer. What could be worse that that?

But yesterday, just as I was about to dispense justice, I looked around and Maria was nowhere to be found. She'd cut my class, and all the clever remarks I'd prepared for her were alas, for naught. If she cuts today, which she's likely as not to do, I won't see her till Monday, and her texting will be so far back in ancient history that she won't even remember why she's never sitting in the back again.

I truly hate it when the diabloical calculations of teenagers, inadvertent though they may be, thwart my evil plans.

Q and A

Q: What do you call 50,000 geeks playing Monopoly?

A: Microsoft.

President Merit Pay Or How I Have Come To Despise Barack Obama

Barack Obama has decided he would like to turn the entire nation into one big KIPP charter school.

In a speech he gave yesterday, he laid out his education proposals which have "progressive" education writers (i.e., people who have never taught a day in their lives but claim to be education experts) like Jay Matthews
and the editors at the NY Daily News soiling their suit pants.

The gist of the speech was this: Obama believes a longer school day, a longer school year, the end of teacher tenure, a merit pay system tied to test scores, additional standardized testing for students, and the end to charter school caps will solve the "education crisis" the nation is suffering from.

None of this is a surprise. I wrote during the primary season that this was his agenda and this was why I was loathe to support him during the primaries (I was first an Edwards man, then I debated voting for Harpo Marx or Ron Paul...) and held my nose when I voted for him in November. The only reason I did vote for him in November is Justice John Paul Stevens is 89 years old, Justice Ginsburg is ill and I didn't want to see a Republican president get another two or three Supreme Court picks. Nonetheless, I regret voting for Obama then and I would like to officially rescind my vote now.

Here's why:

Yes, his education policy is silly. We've covered this stuff before - the regular school day is already 7 hours. My students travel about an hour or more each way to school. That's 9 hours. Many of my students take part in after school activities or internships. That adds another 1 or 2 hours a day. Then there's an hour or more of homework. The older ones work jobs. Many have single parents, so they have to take care of domestic activities - you know, cooking and cleaning and the like. And that's leaving aside the dysfunctional environments so many come from - I just finished grading 105 college essays written by my juniors. Can I tell you how many of those essays were about alcoholism, child abuse, sexual abuse, sickness, mental/emotional illness and other horrific things these kids have to endure every day? And now President Merit Pay wants to add another hour or two a day to their schedules because he thinks that will help them become better educated? Please...if he wants to raise their education levels, start by fixing the sheer dysfunction so many of them grow up in so that they feel small and insignificant and full of despair and anger.

But that's too difficult, isn't it? It's easier to blame society's ills on teachers and schools - they day's not long enough, the year's not long enough, there aren't enough tests, there aren't the right kinds of tests, the teachers suck, teacher tenure sucks, teachers need to be paid on a Merrill Lynch-like bonus system to make things better.

Uh, huh. Every "solution" to the problems in public education President Merit Pay has proposed is meant to socialize kids to expect to have to work longer and harder to make less money in the future.

Longer school day - well, then they won't mind working 10 hour days when they grow up.

No more school vacations - well, then they won't mind the lost vacation time when they grow up and have to compete with workers in Sri Lanka who get 2 vacation days a year.

Merit pay for teachers - well, then they'll expect to be paid themselves on a bonus system when they grow up. Never mind that it was this very bonus or "merit" or commission system that helped create the financial Armageddon on Wall Street (see Merrill Lynch, Bear Sterns, Lehman Brothers, et al.) and Main Street (see real estate bubble) that has nearly and may still bring the nation to its knees. Bonuses are great!

Merit pay for kids - well, again they'll expect crap wages and most of their compensation in bonuses when they grow up. Good for the masters, not so good for the serfs! Never mind that we'll never endear a love of learning or reading or improving in kids by paying them every time they go up a few points on this month's standardized tests, the point is to get them to expect most of their compensation to be "performance-based." And never mind just how (or who) gets to measure that performance. You'll take your gruel and like it!

The point is to prop up the status quo, lower the expectations for what young Americans can expect for their futures. I've said this before. Progress for education "progressives" - global free traders all(see Tom Friedman, Bill Gates, Eli Broad, et al.) - is longer work days, longer work years, longer work careers, and a work system in America that mimics Third World standards.

But there are so many other reasons to despise President Merit Pay beyond the silly little speech he gave on education yesterday. Here are a few more:

He seems intent on setting as much money on fire as possible and handing it hand over fist to AIG, Citigroup, BoA and the rest of the zombie finanacial instituions, all the while mortgaging the country's future by either printing that money or borrowing it from the Chinese.

He can't seem to actually hire anybody else for the Treasury Dept. outside of Little Timmeh Giethner and Larry "Misogynist" Summers, which is troubling considering both of these clowns helped create the mess we're in now and have no idea how to get us out of it other than throw as much borrowed money at the problem as they can, inflation be damned.

As an environmentalist and a person concerned about food safety, I can't tell you how disgusted I am by Obama's pick of "Ag Whore" Tom "I'm owned by Monsanto" Vilsack to run the the Agriculture Department. If you're a big agricultural conglomerate, you're going to do well under the Obama administration. If you're a little farmer trying to grow wholesome, non-genetically modified food, you're not going to do so well.

And finally, he's just a hypocrite. Today he signed a bill loaded with earmarks while railing against earmarks. Seriously. That's as bad as GOP Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell railing against ear marks while loading that very same bill with earmarks. You know what Merit Pay? If you don't like the bill, don't sign it. You have veto power, you know. Oh, and he also railed against signing statements while issuing a signing statement. When I looked that up in the dictionary, it said SEE HYPOCRITE.

Yeah, I'm done. With Obama. I wanted to give him a chance, but I just can't support him any longer. On education policy, financial policy, food policy, the Afghanistan policy, he's shown little to no break with Bush. And yet, even as his policies actually prop up the right wing consituencies like financial institutions, food conglomerates and the defense complex, he still manages to get stereotyped as a "radical socialist." PLLLLEEEEAAAASSSSSEEEE.

About the only thing radical about President Merit Pay is that he takes smoke breaks when he plays basketball.

Other than that, it's business as usual.

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.

I despise both bosses.

POSTSCRIPT: I attended a Jesuit high school in Manhattan. My school has graduated a Supreme Court Justice, a Mayor of New York City (albeit one who was indicted and had to flee the country), captains of industry, lawyers, teachers, doctors, and priests. This school has a rule that all students must be out of the school building by 5 PM and all after school activities must be completed by then. Do you know why? Because the people who run that school believe it is important that the students go home and, if possible, have dinner with their families. Imagine that? Family time that cuts into the school day. Oh, and summer starts the first week of June and ends the first week of September. And yet, somehow, despite less seat time and (gulp!) a shorter school year, the school manages to graduate some pretty successful men. Hmm...maybe it's not all about seat time?

Rabble Rousers

A bunch of troublesome ne'er do wells have started a new one of those blog thingies called Public Eye on Public Schools. Who the hell do these people think they are?

Degrading Neighborhoods, One School at a Time

Mayor Bloomberg has made a great show of closing schools. After he does so, he dumps four or five "academies" in the buildings and calls them small schools. I've seen commercials in which one of the academies is compared with the closed school. Never mind that it's got only 20% of the population, none of the kids are the same, and the "academy" doesn't serve ESL or special ed. kids. The graduation rate of the new kids is higher, so it's a great victory for the "reformers." Except, of course, when they fail (despite valiant efforts to juke the stats).

Sometimes hizzoner doesn't wait to close the school, but dumps an academy right into an existing school. And James Eterno, chapter chair of Jamaica High School, makes a compelling argument that the playing field is far from equal.

It's a shame that Mayor Bloomberg sees fit to shuffle kids around like this. There's nothing that adds value to a neighborhood like a good school. By sabatoging public schools with overcrowding, by closing them rather than fixing them, and by leaving neighborhoods without zoned schools (to accomodate the likes of Eva Moscowitz) Mayor Bloomberg is doing a disservice to neighborhoods all over the city.

The Principal and the Cop

The Post had a story today about a principal who had a very colorful drunk driving escapade. It reminded me of this tale, which has very deep political and social import:

A cop stops a principal for driving erratically. He asks him to take a breathalyzer. The principal says, "Oh, no, I have asthma. I can't blow into that thing. I might have an attack!"

The cop says, , "OK, then, you can come down to the station and we'll give you a blood test."

The principal replies, "Oh, no officer, I can't do that. I'm a hemophiliac. If you make me do that, I'll bleed to death."

The cop sighs, and says, "Alright, we'll go down to the station and do a urine test."

The principal shakes his head. "I'm diabetic, and if I do that it could wreak havoc with my blood sugar."

The cop, losing patience, turns to the principal and says, "Fine. Get out of your car, and we'll see if you can walk the white line. We'll settle this right here."

"Oh, I can't do that, officer."

"Well, for goodness sakes, why not?"

"Because I'm drunk," the principal says.

The UFT Answer Man

Recently the union has begun sending people to my school to keep us informed. They come in the cafeteria and give speeches about things. I usually mind my own business and eat lunch, but the other day one of them started a conversation with me. He made the egregious error of asking if I had any questions, and I asked him the same one I've asked Leo Casey on Edwize, the same question I've asked several NYC education reporters, the question I've posed to various wonks on the net:

"The UFT is now partnering with Green Dot, a charter chain that announces on its website their teachers have neither tenure nor seniority rights. Edwize says because or their "just clause provision their teachers have something better than tenure. How many times has the clause been tested, and how many teacher positions has it saved?"

"When I was in Nebraska," he began.

"What does that have to do with my question?" I asked.

"Well, you have to understand how things work in the middle of the country. Sometimes these teachers sign contracts, they get raises, and then they don't get them the next year."

"But Green Dot started in California, and now we've brought them to New York. What does the middle of the country have to do with my question?"

He smiled and showed me a form. "Would you like to contribute to COPE?" he asked me. "We've done a lot of great things, like 55-25."

"First of all, it's 55-27 for most. And also, we paid for that with all those givebacks in 05."

"No, it's COPE that paid for that."

"But COPE also paid to support Serphin Maltese, who was instrumental in breaking two Catholic school unions."

"Well, yes we did that."

"And you supported Governor Pataki against Carl McCall. Also, you didn't oppose Mayor Bloomberg when he ran for re-election."

"Well, he was going to win."

"And you supported mayoral control, which has been a disaster for teachers and kids."

"Well, you need to support the union." he said.

"The union needs to let high school teachers select their own Academic Vice President, even if it means they may lose. They changed the constitution to take our choice away."

"Yes, but they won that year."

"Who won that year?" I asked.

"Unity." he replied. Perhaps he was a New Action guy. New Action, you may recall, was the party that ran Mike Shulman, who beat the Unity guy. When Unity insisted on a revote, he won again, by a larger margin if I recall correctly. Unity used to vilify them precisely as they now vilify ICE. Then UFT President Randi Weingarten gave all their leaders patronage gigs, and now (surprise!) they support whoever Unity says should be UFT President.

Otherwise, there go their gigs.

"It's unconscionable," I told him.

"You know what your problem is?" he asked me. I love when people offer to tell me what my problem is. Don't you? Isn't it kind when people get ready to offer you constructive advice?

"You think you know everything," he said. He then went on to lecture me about the virtues of working within the system, and how that was the only way to get things done.

Oddly, I hadn't suggested anything about working outside the system. But I'm very familiar with the UFT system. And I know very well what they've been doing since 05.

We'll answer your questions, as long as they're the right ones. Ask the wrong questions and we'll make nonsensical speculations on what you think. Who the hell do you think you are, being well-informed? This is not how we get people to vote for us, and don't even think about telling anyone else what goes on.

Isn't it ironic when you hear Ms. Weingarten complaining about the top-down management style of Mayor Bloomberg? For all I know, he may have learned it entirely from her.

Be Glad the Kids Won't Eat Vegetables

A store in Ozone Park, Queens, has been selling peppers stuffed with cocaine.

And heavens to Betsy, Joe the Plumber has had it with Michael Steele.

I Had to Do It

I often sit in the office and try to get work done. It's hard, because my colleagues are always marching in and out with the latest gossip, or the most egregious outrages they've witnessed over the last period or two. I'm almost always ready to procrastinate. And then there are the kids.

Every kid who gets sent to the office is completely innocent. Every teacher knows that.

"Why did Ms. Wormwood send you here?"

"No reason."

"She just decided to kick you out for the heck of it?"

"Man, Ms. Wormwood is crazy. Ask anyone."

Usually, I end up asking Ms. Wormwood, who has a very different view of things. And even when kids are right, I try to persuade them it's to their advantage to sit and smile so they don't end up seeing Ms. Wormwood again in September. Sometimes I succeed.

Other times, kids give me stories that are so odd, they must be true.

"Why did Ms. Wormwood throw you out?" I asked a shy-looking boy.

"I told a joke."

"You know you're not supposed to do that."

"I couldn't help it," he says. "The class was really boring. Everyone was falling asleep. Somebody had to do something."

"So what did you do?"

"Well, most people in Ms. Wormwood's class speak my language," the kid said.

"Why is that important?" I asked.

"Well, I know this really good joke, and I knew it would wake them up."

"Did it?"

"Oh, yes it did. Everyone started laughing. That's why Ms. Wormwood is so mad at me."

"Well, you knew she'd be mad at you. I'd probably be mad at you too."

"Oh, no Mr. Educator, I wouldn't fall asleep in your class. You scream too much."

"Thank you, I guess."

"Don't you see? They were falling asleep. Someone had to do something! I sacrificed myself so I could wake up the class. I had to do it. Don't you understand?"

I didn't really. But the kid was so passionate about it that I didn't know exactly what to say to him. Sometimes I'm glad to slide dilemmas like these over to administrators. They get paid the big bucks to figure this stuff out.

Raise the Cone of Silence

Maxwell Smart's shoe phone is finally a reality, and may soon be coming to a foot near you.

Behind The Curve

It has become increasingly clear that Secretary of the Treasury Timothy Geithner has no clearer idea how to fix the financial mess than Hank Paulson, Ben Bernanke and the rest of the "Masters of the Universe" who created it in the first place do.

The Bush administration's idea for cleaning up the mess was to throw money at the problem - hundreds and hundreds of billions - and hope for the best.

Anybody see any difference with what the Obama administration is doing? I sure don't.

The Bushies threw tons of money at AIG, Citigroup, BoA and other failed institutions - the Obama people are doing the same.

The Bushies refused to "nationalize" zombie (i.e., failed and insolvent) banks because "we're, uh, capitalists, you know..." - the Obama administration has the same policy.

Meanwhile every week the U.S. government prints more money and borrows as much money as it can from overseas and hands it out to these failed institutions.

And the list of failing "bluechips" keeps growing - the latest rumor going around is that General Electric needs a bailout. If GE goes belly-up, well, that would be pretty bad for the American economy. As Joe Nocera put it in the NY Times:

A General Electric bailout would be a devastating blow to a country that is already reeling. I can’t think of anything that would be more corrosive to our already low confidence, and it would serve as a huge setback for the economic recovery we’re all praying for.

The jobs numbers keep getting worse and the housing numbers are abysmal - the Times reports this today:

Despite tentative signs of recovery in hard-hit areas like California and Florida, the broader housing market is far from reaching bottom, economists say. Across much of the nation, prices are likely to keep falling into 2010.

So this March-to-June season, when most homes are bought and sold, will be bad, perhaps the worst since the market began to spiral down in 2006.

Across the nation, 19 million houses and apartments — nearly one out of every seven — are vacant, the highest percentage since the 1960s. But only about six million of those homes are for sale or for rent. That means millions more could still flood onto the market, depressing prices further.

For would-be sellers, the bad news keeps coming. This week, one new report showed that one in nine mortgages was delinquent or in foreclosure, while another showed that January contract signings for sales of previously owned homes fell at their fastest pace in two years.

Doesn't look like the housing market is getting better any time soon and if the job market continues to dive, well, that doesn't bode well for either housing or the overall American economy, does it?

Nouriel Roubini - the man who predicted the current mess would happen - says world governments are not doing enough to remedy the problems:

The global recession may continue until the end of 2010 as the response by governments to rectify it is “too little, too late,” said Nouriel Roubini, the New York University professor who predicted the financial crisis.

“Governments are falling behind the curve,” Roubini said at the India Today Conclave in New Delhi today. “This recession can end up becoming even worse.”

The situation can be improved by appropriate policies, including governments taking over insolvent banks, cleaning them up and re-selling them to private investors, he said. The Group of Seven and the Group of Twenty economies “must act together to get out of this mess,” Roubini said.

Roubini says if we continue on our current course, the recession will go through 2010 at least.

Scary times.

And the new bosses don't seem to be doing anything different than the old bosses.

No Oversight, No Integrity

I couldn't find a working printer in my school last week.

I needed to type and print out a letter of recommendation for a student who was applying to the Presidential Scholars Program at the Fashion Institute of Technology. She needed the letter by March 9th and she had given me plenty of notice to write it, but due to various circumstances I had let the task go until the end of last week.

I typed up the letter, wrote her a glowing recommendation for the program (she really is a terrific student and an all-around nice person) and pushed "PRINT" on the computer.

Nothing but an "ERROR" message came from the printer in the computer lab on the 9th floor. I spent a few minutes trying to figure out the problem, but I had to teach in 20 minutes so I couldn't play computer technician forever. I saved the letter and ran down to the 7th floor computer lab.

It took me about 10 minutes to get my account logged in because the computers are ancient and overloaded with software - the systems run as rapidly as dial-up works for downloads - but finally got logged in and hit "PRINT".

Again, nothing. Another teacher in the lab told me that sometimes the printer will spit out your print job about a half an hour after you hit "PRINT," but you can't be sure, because sometimes it won't.

Now I was down to 5 minutes before I teach. I could go to the College Office where 8 fairly new computers bought with post-9/11 grant money sit and print the letter there. But my school has 425 seniors and there is always a waiting list for the computers as the kids jostle to check their CUNY application statuses, financial aid information and various other things.

Instead I went back to my classroom and said to my student, "Give me your email and I'll email the letter to you. I can't find a working printer to print the thing..."

Ahh, yes, life in Mayor Moneybags' New York City Department of Education III (we're on our third reorganization, you know!!!) - lots of b.s. p.r. about improved test scores, school safety, improved technology, etc., but the reality never fits the p.r. that Moneybags and his minion Uncle Joel Klein present to the news media and the public.

Another example - my school is 10 floors, we have 1700 students and another 150 staff. Three elevators work. The other three are being fixed. It took years to get the capital improvement money to finally replace the old elevators (which broke down EVERY day) with new elevators (which break down EVERY OTHER day.) I used to live about a mile from my school and I am not kidding when I say that it took me a shorter amount of time to take the train to work then it did to take the elevator up 9 floors. Now I don't even bother with the elevator, I walk up the 9 flights of stairs three or four times a day. Keeps me slimmer than I ought to be in middle age, so thanks Moneybags, you're really helping keep my weight down! The only problem is, if the bell has rung and kids are running up and down stairs, it's more like playing hockey than walking stairs, but no matter. What doesn't kill you inevitably makes you stronger.

Another problem in my school is the heat - we have two settings for the boiler: "OFF" and "HELLISH" - when the custodians run the heat (which is almost all the time...it seems the one budget that hasn't been cut is the oil budget...), the building is about 105 degrees. I'm not kidding - some rooms have thermometers and you can check to see. Now you expect these same rooms to be 105 degrees in June and September (because they are without air conditioners), but not inJanuary and February. And yet, winter, spring, summer - it doesn't matter what the season is, it's always 105 degrees in my school and I'm always feeling vaguely dehydrated, like an extra from Ishtar. Frankly, I'd wear shorts all year round to school except I'd probably catch cold walking to and from the train.

As for after school programs, the only ones funded these days are extended day classes. All the other clubs and programs, if they are still running, are doing so because teachers are volunteering their time to run them. Now even in good times you knew if you worked one of these programs or clubs that you would only be paid one hour for every three hours you worked, but now you're not paid at all. Still, most of my colleagues continue to work these programs and clubs. One wonders if all that "volunteer time" will become expected even after the economy and the school budget improves? I'm betting it does...

OK, so you can see how we need some capital improvements and technology funds to make life a little more tolerable and school staff and students a little more efficient as they go about there work. But that money, hard to get even during flush times, sure isn't coming now that we have ECONOMIC ARMAGEDDON in the country. Granted, my class sizes, currently at 34, probably won't go to 44 now that the federal stimulus money is coming and the mayor says he won't have to lay off any teachers, but the rest of that money will inevitably go into the toilet (i.e., go to Uncle Joel and the Tweedites, where it will be spent on nonsense, administration costs, consultants, no-bid contracts or outside contractors.)

Take this NY Post story from Monday that explains how Uncle Joel and the Tweedites hired an outside firm to look for cost-cutting savings in the system - only they by-passed the lowest bidders and hired the firm that cost the MOST:

City education officials facing severe budget cuts awarded a $2 million consulting contract to a company whose bid was four times as high as the lowest offer.

The contract to hire a seven-person cost-cutting team was won by the consulting giant Accenture.

...

DOE documents show the average hourly rates proposed by eight other companies for an entry-level "specialist" role was $72. Accenture's winning bid was $200 an hour.

For the role of entry-level project manager, the eight companies proposed an average hourly rate of $88.

Accenture, sponsor of the just-completed golf match in which Tiger Woods made his comeback, bid $323 an hour.

It was eventually cut to $315, but it still will provide a $504,000 payout for the 10-month position.

That's the equivalent of twice the salary of Schools Chancellor Joel Klein.

"That's the highest rate I've ever heard in my life," said a losing bidder. "There appears to be no integrity there and obviously there's no oversight."

Education officials defended the selection of Accenture, saying it was based on "best value" rather than "lowest bid."

Jason Henry, chief administrator for school based procurement, said that Accenture's overall bid for the work - which involves streamlining and cutting the cost of purchasing trade and library books and audio-visual equipment - was at least 10 percent more "competitive" than the second-place bid.

I love that quote from one of the losing bidders who says there seems to be no integrity, no oversight at Uncle Joel's Department of Education - all I can say is, NO KIDDING!!!! Klein and the Tweedites hand out no-bid contract to cronies or hand out contracts to the highest bidders while I can't find a working printer in my school to print out a letter of recommendation, have to walk 9 flights of stair four times a day because the elevators don't work, and have eczema on my hands and arms because the heater works too freaking well.

Yeah, I'd have to agree with that person who lost the bid to cut costs in the NYCDOE to a higher bidder - there is no integrity or oversight at Tweed or at City Hall, not if you're connected to either Bloomberg or Klein. But if you're just a little peon like a teacher, well, then look out. That $80 million dollar ARIS computer system they bought through a no-bid contract is tracking your test scores, so you better shape the hell up!!!!

And now I have to end this post because I have an 11:00 allergist appointment to take care of my eczema. Can't wait until Bloomberg and Klein and Weingarten conspire to raise health care costs for teachers.

I mean, who wouldn't love to have to pay extra to go to the doctor for health care conditions caused by the crappy environmental conditions at your job?

Tax Time

Back when I was a new teacher making almost no money, I brought my taxes to H. & R. Block, which was right down the street from me. Then one year I found out the lazy slob doing my taxes, who probably shucked oysters the rest of the year, had neglected a deduction for what I paid in state taxes. Since then, I've paid a CPA who actually knows what he's doing.

In case you need one, here's another reason to avoid the Blockheads--they might send your refund to the wrong person.

Hold the Presses!

Gotham Schools reports that several people to whom NYC Schools Chancellor Joel Klein doled out employment think he's doing a great job.

Mr. Bloomberg Makes a Clarification

Sometimes, when you're the mayor of a big city, you have to explain what you mean. For example, Mayor Bloomberg explained that when he said he would get rid of trailers instead of classrooms by 2012, what he really meant was he would not get rid of trailers instead of classrooms by 2012.

Now a lot of people took exception when they saw this quote from hizzoner:

"If you got up this morning, looked outside, and the question didn't come to you right away, 'Hmm, I wonder whether or not school is going to be open today,' and you didn't know enough to call 311, I would suggest another day in school's probably a good idea," the mayor said at a briefing.

"I mean, come on," he added. "Looking outside, it's a legitimate question, and you know how to get an answer."

Understandably, a lot of parents were upset by this language. It certainly sounds as though he's calling them a bunch of knuckle-draggers. After all, the decision to close the schools didn't hit the media till almost 6 AM, and what with the rampant overcrowding that's accompanied this mayor's "reforms," a lot of schools open at 7, including mine. That's why a hundred kids showed up at our school.

But one of the mayor's spokespersons has "clarified" Mr. Bloomberg's statement for us, according to Manhattan PEP rep Patrick Sullivan. On a comments page of NYC Public School Parents, Sullivan writes:

...the AP coverage of the mayor's comments included this update: "An aide tried to backtrack later and insisted that Bloomberg was referring only to teachers, and not to students or parents."

This, to me, is incredible. According to the revisionist history of the Bloomberg PR machine, the mayor did not mean to include the hundreds of thousands of parents and kids who were confused by his failure to provide adequate notice. Even if you believe this highly improbably interpretation, what it clearly suggests is that it's unacceptable to ridicule parents and students for mistakes that are none of their doing.

On the other hand, it also suggests that it's fine to ridicule people who get up every morning to teach children. That's a disgrace. As a teacher, as a parent who respects teachers, I'm disgusted by Mayor Bloomberg's remarks. Mayor Bloomberg owes the city an apology. Instead, we get a variation on, "I meant only to ridicule teachers, so it's no big deal."

Masters Of the Universe

Have you seen Jon Stewart's scathing attack of the business "experts" at CNBC? If you haven't, here it is:

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

CNBC Gives Financial Advice

Daily Show Full Episodes
Important Things With Demetri Martin

Political Humor
Joke of the Day

Now I sort of like Rick Santelli, the CNBC analyst who went crazy on TV the other week railing about President Obama's mortgage plan and how it was going to help bail out "losers" who don't deserve the help. But the rant smacked of hypocrisy, given the hundreds of billions both administrations have handed out to financial institutions, insurers and auto makers and the taxpayer money the CEO's of those institutions have squandered on bonuses, junkets, etc. Nary a complaint about that kind of stuff is ever made on CNBC, though you hear all kinds of stuff about learning how to "Obama-proof" your portfolio for the long haul.

Leaving aside the "loser" rhetoric for a moment, I think you can make a good case that the administration's mortgage plan creates a moral hazard and won't address the real issue in the mortgage/real estate crisis any way - home prices inflated way too much in many places around the country and those prices need to come back down to levels more in line with the historic ratio between wages and home prices.

But if you're watching CNBC these days, you would be under the impression that it was President Obama who created the current financial catastrophe instead of the real culprits - Uncle Alan Greenspan and his monetary policy (cheap money, cheap money, cheap money...), George Bush and his deregulation policies (How did the SEC miss the Ponzi schemes run by Bernie Madoff and Sir Allen Stanford? Oh, yeah, they didn't investigate them even after they were told funky things were going on...), the Republican-led Congress that happily went along with those policies and the subsequent Democratic-led Congress that refuses to hold the people who stole hundreds of billions of dollars accountable to the law

A good start would be investigating and prosecuting Angelo Mozilo, John Thain, Chuck Prince, Jimmy Cayne, Phil Gramm and the crooks at AIG and the ratings agencies. Then look to see who else in Washington besides Phil Gramm helped grease the skids for all the criminal activity - (Schumer? Rangel? the entire Republican Party?) and hold them accountable too.

While we're at it, maybe take a look at the connections between the financial experts at CNBC and the crooks they were covering. Why was Jim Cramer, for example, pushing Bear before it imploded, Countrywide before it imploded, Lehman before it imploded, Wachovia before it imploded, Bank of America before it fell to below $4 a share? Is he just the dumbest financial analyst on the planet or is he crook looking to make some money for himself and his cronies (the guys he calls "my people") at the taxpayers' and/or his viewers' expense?

There sure is a lot of blame to go around and there are an awful lot of people on Wall Street and in Washington who really ought to be frogmarched into prison for a few years -but there are also a few cheerleaders on CNBC who ought to face the music too.

As Jon Stewart noted the other night on The Daily Show, you could have had a million dollars if you had followed the advice of the smarmy Ayn Randites on CNBC - provided you had started with a hundred million dollars first.

Forget about Obama-proofing your portfolio - try Cramer-proofing it instead.

Barney Must Die

Over at Joanne Jacobs, there's a discussion about how people want to ban Barbie (who just turned 50, if I'm not mistaken). I don't care much whether she gets banned or not. I think there are more pressing issues at hand.

To wit, why is no one trying to ban Barney the Dinosaur? I suffered through many an excruciating public-domain number from insipid Barney and his goody-two-shoe friends, and I think it's our duty to spare our students, future parents, from what we've endured. Now if you've got a toddler who's currently making you listen to that awful music, you might enjoy the Barney Fun Page, where you can use various weapons to decimate this miserable reptile.

In the long run, though, don't we owe it to future generations to do away with this menace? Could we ban him with a Constitutional amendment? Or is this a states' rights thing?

Really, something must be done.

Soup for You

Get the complete series of Seinfeld on DVD for a hundred bucks.

via

Souring the Rookie

Mr. Green was the best lunch patrol anyone had ever seen. He checked every schedule, looked at every ID card, and turned away every would-be gate crasher. In 14 years as lunch dean, Mr. Crusty had never seen his like. With Mr. Green at the door, he could move all the way to the back door, where nothing ever happened, and think about fishing, or unnatural sex acts, or whatever lunch deans think about when there's nothing else to do. It was as though fate had finally smiled upon him.

Thank goodness Randi Weingarten and Joel Klein had put pen to paper and given teachers perpetual building assignments. If he played his cards right, he could praise this kid to the stars and get him to volunteer again next year. Maybe he could recruit a whole cadre of Greens, and sit his ass in the back right up to his retirement. Maybe he could hold out another five years with kids like these.

But then it happened. Mr. Blister, the hall dean, asked Mr. Green to walk a kid to the dean's office. Mr. Green was more than ready to help out, and dutifully walked three hallways and four flights of stairs with the kid. When they got to the dean's office, two NYPD officers immediately placed the kids in cuffs and began walking him out of the office.

"Why are you taking him?" asked Mr. Green.

"Manslaughter," replied one of the cops, nonchalantly, and continued hustling the kid out.

Mr. Green thought about that kid, walking behind him, and of all the things that could happen to someone with a killer behind him. That day, in the cafeteria, Mr. Green was noncommittal. "Let me see your program," he told the kids, but he didn't check. He let everyone in. By the third day, the kids had gotten wise. The cafeteria was getting overcrowded, and Mr. Crusty had to move up front.

He tried flattering the kid, but he'd lost his edge. In two weeks, they reassigned Mr. Green to an office, where he continued to do such mediocre work that they eventually stopped asking him to do anything whatsoever.

Mr. Crusty never found a suitable replacement, and his plans for a tip-top lunch corps were crushed. His dreams thus broken, he took terminal leave at the end of January.

Drug Dealers

Is it just me, or have you noticed the odd things they mention when they advertise prescription drugs on TV? They tell you how wonderful they are, for a minute, and then spend two more saying it may cause headaches, stomach pain, fever, vomiting, diarrhea, cancer, death, and dizziness. Don't take it if you're pregnant, planning to become pregnant, or if permanent sterility would pose a problem for you.

I don't even know what homeopathic medicine is, but listening to these ads, it's beginning to sound appealing. Who even cares if it works, as long as it doesn't do what those drugs in the ads do?

Mayor Bloomberg Thinks We're Stupid

NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg sees nothing wrong with his flunkies having waited till 5:39 to decide whether or not to close school on Monday. That's not much of a surprise, as Mayor Mike has found little fault with anything his administration has done, and overturns the will of the voters about as easily as you or I take a drink of water.

"If you got up this morning, looked outside, and the question didn't come to you right away, 'Hmm, I wonder whether or not school is going to be open today,' and you didn't know enough to call 311, I would suggest another day in school's probably a good idea," the mayor said at a briefing.

"I mean, come on," he added. "Looking outside, it's a legitimate question, and you know how to get an answer."

I do indeed. That's why, when I woke up at 5 AM on Monday, the first thing I did was check whether city schools were open. There was no indication they weren't, so I prepared to go to work. And if I was doing that, so were hundreds or thousands of parents, teachers, and kids doing the same. But the city offered no answer, and the DoE's website suggested we wait for info. If you don't think people were scrambling to figure what to do, check out the comments right here.

I was stupid enough to get out a shovel to dig out my car. Like many of my colleagues, I've gone in on worse days. And a hundred kids were stupid enough to show up at our school, obviously suggesting their parents were stupid too. Several administrators were stupid enough to show up. In fact, one suburban teacher was stupid enough to bring a child whose school was closed. Stupid us, figuring that past precedent was worth heeding.

The defense for waiting till the last minute, unlike virtually every neighboring district, was that they've always done it that way. It's ironic that "reformers" would use an excuse like that, and it's obvious that 37 years of bad policy is poor defense for its deliberate continuation.

But actually, things are different. An astute colleague of mine pointed out that it's only recently they began opening schools at 7 AM. It's only recently that schools have become so overcrowded they need to keep them open till 5:30 PM. It's only recently they started loading up schools to 250% capacity.

It was not unreasonable for parents to complain they got no notice from this mayor. Not everyone has billions of dollars. Some of us, lacking live-in help, have to figure out what to do with our kids on days we work and they have no school.

Maybe that's what makes us stupid.

Emergency!

Florida woman calls 911 three times when Mickey D's runs out of McNuggets.

Something to Smile About (Maybe)

Someone's finally sent me what may be an email suggesting what may be a worthwhile resource. Here's a teacher certification map, telling you you may need to be certified in various states. If you use it, please let us know what you think in the comments. I spent hours on the phone with the state trying to figure out what was needed, what courses would help, and whatever else they wanted me to do. So I hope this makes it easier for someone!

A Scam by Any Other Name

For a long time, I tried to be open to charters. It's tough, though, since the overwhelming majority are not unionized. You read stories about charters that vilify and fire people simply because they tell their colleagues how much UFT teachers earn, and you ask yourself, "Are these the kind of jobs I want for my kids when they grow up?"

And they're not, really. Even those which claim to be unionized, like Green Dot, specifically preclude both tenure and seniority rights for their teachers. Even part-time UFT President Randi "Everything is on the table except vouchers" Weingarten seems OK with that, bringing Green Dot to New York. As far as I can determine, even after the UFT spend over half a million in dues on legal fees, NY Green Dot teachers still don't even have a contract.

When you read detailed stories like this one by teacher Sarah Knopp, though, you have to really question the motives behind charter schools. Even President Barack Obama thinks they're a good idea. I can understand their appeal to parents, as I work in a preposterously overcrowded school with class sizes of 34 or more. Sadly, we don't have Bill Gates, Eli Broad, and the Walmart family dumping millions into our budget to allow us reasonable class sizes or decent facilities for our kids.

There is certainly a move toward privatization here. Otherwise, how would Eva Moskowitz be able to pay herself $371,000, well more than my principal, who's got a much tougher job than she does? There's plenty of money in education for entrepeneurs who are willing to open charters and take money from billionaires. It's the gold rush all over again.

And if you make sure you get the right kids, as Knapp points out, you can look a lot better than your alleged competion:

At KIPP schools, like many other charters, a condition of admission is that students’ parents have to spend a certain amount of volunteer time at the school. This automatically excludes children whose parents already spend the least time with them (due to working multiple jobs, lack of child care, or any number of difficult issues). While in some cases strictly competitive admissions cannot be used in charters receiving federal funds (although the rules are very flexible, as in New Orleans), these schools can select their students and transfer or expel students with less due process than they are afforded in regular schools.

So not only do you get a "better class" of student, you dump the undesirables into the public system, and thus lower their statistics. Your school must be better if you have higher test scores. Who cares if the kids in public schools don't speak Enlish, or are learning disabled, or dyslexic, or have indifferent parents, or whatever?

Or you can boast about how your teachers get a voice in planning. That's one of the calling cards of Green Dot, in which Steve Barr boasts teachers gladly give up tenure to work for him. But teachers only get that voice until they don't:

It is understood and agreed that the Board retains all of its powers and authority to direct, manage and control to the full extent of the charter school law and the regulations of a 501.C3 California corporation. Input from the staff will be considered and decisions will be derived in a collaborative model; final decisions will rest with the Board. Included in, but not limited to, those duties are the right to: ...establish educational policies with regard to admitting students; ...determine the number of personnel and types of personnel needed; ...establish budget procedures and determine budgetary allocations; contract out work and take action on any matter in the event of an emergency.

.

Hmmm...is that what they gave up tenure for? They have the freedom to contribute and innovate--right up until the point when they don't.

Another oft-repeated fable about charters is that they pay people more. But if you're working more hours a week, more weeks a year, if you're on call nights with your charter-provided cell phone, and if you're doing half-days on Saturdays, well, couldn't you actually be earning less for your time than public school teachers? It's true that prominent figures like Mayor Bloomberg and part-time UFT President Randi Weingarten don't account for extra time when they describe "raises," but honestly, what's more valuable than your time?

It looks to me like charters are a short-term fix, and the fact that their results, even given their unfair advantages, are mixed, suggests they might not be the panacea their supporters suggest. More importantly, is it good for Americans to set up teaching as a temporary profession which only young, energetic people can keep up with? I mean, sure, it keeps salaries down when you use people for a few years until they inevitably burn out, but are those the jobs we want for our kids?

Randi Weingarten's been snookered:

New York City schools chancellor Joel Klein has openly declared his wish to make all New York public schools charter schools. Rather than oppose the idea outright, then-United Federation of Teachers president Randi Weingarten chose to play ball on the chancellor’s field. In addition to inviting Steve Barr of Green Dot to New York to partner with the UFT in opening Green Dot schools, she also conceded that New York teachers would be willing to accept some form of merit pay. Merit pay hooks teacher bonuses (money that otherwise could be spent on salaries) to student test performance.

If this “appeasement” strategy was designed to convince Klein to stop blaming teachers for the problems in New York’s schools, it didn’t work. Shortly thereafter, Klein teamed up with civil rights figure Al Sharpton to launch the Education Equality Project, whose main goal is to remove the “block” that the teachers’ union supposedly creates to “reform.” Sharpton said, “But we cannot say that we’re going to close this achievement gap but protect ineffective teachers or principals or school chiefs or not challenge parents.”⁵⁴ Perhaps if the teachers in New York had decided to build genuine alliances with New York parents—particularly in communities of color—to fight for access to more resources, against dictatorial mandates, and to define what “quality education” means from the ground up, then Sharpton wouldn’t have gotten any traction for blaming the teachers. A more convincing explanation for failure of Black students is gross underfunding and pervasive segregation.

But that doesn't mean you have to be. Just like when Ms. Weingarten endorsed the disastrous 2005 contract, she was thanked briefly and then stabbed in the back. It's regrettable that someone as bright as Ms. Weingarten either fails to have a long-term vision, or simply doesn't care what happens to unionized teachers, or unions themselves.

But there's a very dangerous precedent at work. When the patronage hacks come to your school, ask them why the UFT chose to partner up with a firm that offers neither tenure nor seniority rights to its teachers. Should they spout the nonsense about "just cause" provisions, ask them how many times it's been tested, and how many teacher positions it's saved.

I've repeatedly asked the ones who appear at my school, as well as Ms Weingarten's internet mouthpiece Leo Casey.

This is what they've told me. Expect to hear much of the same.

Where Were You?

I was in my garage, wearing a sweatshirt, a parka, and heavy boots. I'd just picked up a snow shovel and was getting ready to shovel out my car so I could go to work. My wife and daughter came down, dragged me back upstairs, and rewound the TIVO to show me that city schools were closed.

I left my trusty shovel and came up to revise the blog.

I'd woken up at five in the morning to prepare to go to work. Why on earth couldn't Chancellor Klein have made the decision to close the schools before 6 in the morning, particularly when many city schools open at 7? The Chancellor claimed to be worried about the parents of a million public school kids. Didn't having to wait till 6 AM inconvenience them even more? Where I live, they really worry about public school parents, which is why we got a recorded call last night telling us schools would be closed.

Chancellor Klein loves accountability. How should he be held accountable for this?

Where were you when you found out NYC schools were closed? What were you doing?

Stay Home!

1010 WINS school closing page says New York City Schools are closed.


Channel 4 says so too! As do channels 2 and 7. Thanks to those who commented.

Thanks to Former NYC Math Teacher

Good Morning New York!

It's five in the morning. My local school district called last night to say schools are closed here. On channel 2 news they're advising that people stay home until a break in the snow later this morning.

School closings are here, and I don't see NYC, of course.

Falling and blowing snow, blizzard and/ or whiteout conditions, and I'm going in, I guess. Wish me luck.

I wish all of you luck too!

What Are The Odds?

The weatherman is forecasting a very nasty late winter storm for tonight and tomorrow. Here is how WNBC TV describes the next 24 hours or so:

March is roaring in like a lion, with most of New York and New Jersey under a winter storm warning for heavy snow from Sunday night to Monday evening. The storm could dump more than a foot of snow on New York City.

About 13 inches of snow was projected by Monday morning in Manhattan and between 10 and 14 inches in suburban Long Island. Wind gusts could near 35 mph, which will make travel very hazardous or impossible, according to the National Weather Service.

Now I've been working for the New York City Department of Education for nearly 8 years.

Mayor Moneybags and Uncle Joel Klein have been running the system for most of that time.

In all that time, there has only been 1 snow day, when Uncle Joel and Mayor Moneybags drove to City Hall in their SUV's and said kids and school staff should stay home.

So as I read tomorrow's forecast, with 13 inches, 35 mph winds and travel that is very hazardous or impossible, I'm wondering what are the odds that Moneybags and Uncle Joel drive to City Hall in their SUV's tonight and declare tomorrow a snow day for NYC schools?

I mean I know very hazardous to impossible travel sounds like a bad thing, but as Uncle Joel often brags, NYC has the most school days and the highest amount of seat time of any major urban school system and just because 13 feet of snow and 35 mph winds are making travel hazardous and nearly impossible, that doesn't mean Little Susie and Little Johnny shouldn't have to trudge into school to prep for their 8 city standardized tests and 1 state standardized test a year or teachers shouldn't have to come in for hour and a half meetings with the no-bid contract folks at McGraw-Hill over how to use those city standardized acuity test results to "inform your teaching."

That's what I'm supposed to do - meet with some faceless 20-something acuity testing bureaucrat who has never taught a day in his/her life and listen to him/her lecture me on how to utilize the tests McGraw-Hill devised under their no-bid contract.

You can imagine how I might be praying for a lot of snow tonight.

I mean a lot.

A snow day from school, well, that's all right I suppose.

But a snow day from an hour and a half professional development meeting with a faceless 20-something acuity testing bureaucrat who has never taught a day in his/her life - well as the announcer used to say in those awful Visa commercials - that's priceless!!!

Must Be Worse Than I Imagined...

Chicago Wal-Mart associate sets himself on fire outside the store.

You Just Can't Win

So says Frank McCourt.

Oh No!

Well, it looks like we're gonna have another civil war. And it must be true, because they said so on Fox News, which is fair and balanced.

But that's what happens, apparently, when those awful liberals ask rich people to pay more in taxes. Who woulda thunk it? The rabble taking up torches and pitchforks to protest Steve Forbes' tax rate, just like they did when Eisenhower was President and they paid 90%?

They didn't protest? Well, never mind. Who wants to go back to that economy anyway?

Americans enjoyed a strong, expanding economy under Eisenhower, demonstrated by solid economic growth, little inflation, and low unemployment. Balancing the budget was an Eisenhower priority tempered with a sincere concern for the common good. Eisenhower expanded social security, increased the minimum wage, and established the Department of Health, Education, and Welfare (HEW).

Sounds just awful. Thank goodness we had Fox News and GW Bush to set things straight.

Thanks to Schoolgal