Wednesday, December 09, 2015

45 Things I Say In Class

The following is a list compiled by a former student of mine. He says I tend to repeat one or two of these statements from time to time. Actually, he says I say them all of the time, and also mix and match them on a fairly regular basis. 

Disclaimers---Names have been changed to protect the innocent. I make no claim as to accuracy or lack thereof, but I do notice quite a few of my current students say one or two of these things. 

Of course I have no idea why.


2:How could you?

3:After all my hard work, all my years of sacrifice...

4:What do I ask? Just a little bit .. a litle bit, an itsy-bitsy, teency-weency, teeny-tiny bit... but  NOOOOOOOOO!

5:I‘m so disappointed...

6:Did I say that out loud ? I thought I was just thinking about it...

7:OMG!T. is cutting again?!How could he? (Actually, T. is in classroom, another student pointed to him and claimed he was cutting.) I almost passed him!

8:OMG!You're late...I'm shocked and stunned.

9:You didn't do the homework? You get a big fat zero (places paper zero on desk).

10: You broke my heart!

11: It's nice to be important, but it‘s important to be nice.

12: It's very rude to speak when other people are speaking.

13: Don't speak Chinese (any language) in English class.

14: This class room is NYC Educator land... In NYC Educator land we speak only English. Outside this door is the United States where you can speak whatever language you like.

15: If you‘re mad at me you get big fat zero. If I'm mad at you, you get big fat zero (places paper zero on desk).

16: If you're mad at me, you go to summer school. If I'm mad at  you, you go to summer school.

17: Let's do a little bit vocabulary, just a little bit. ..(writes 500 words on board)

18: I heard something no good.

19: Did you say something no good?

20: I 'm just a little worried.

21: I am not scared of Ms. S. (teacher), and anyone who says I am is a big fat liar.

22: beach, summer school, beach, summer school (pointing one student to another, infinite loop)...

23: good, no good, good, no good (pointing one student to another, infinite loop)...

24: T. is my top student. (about any student, good, bad, or indifferent)

25: X.(one of the girls, almost always) is good student. I won't hear a bad word about her. 

26: No thinking, just writing.

27: Real men don't need to think...

28: Thinking is garbage.

29: T. (student) is very shy, just like me (class laughs out loud).

30: Good news!  Test today.

31: Bad news! No homework tonight.

32: Ms. S. has  big fun...but we work like a dog.

33: Real men teach.

34: Don't call me chicken. Nobody calls me chicken.

35:  You called me a big fat liar? You are a big fat liar.

36: I hate New Jersey.

37: I hate that baby, baby, baby oooooh song. Anyone who sings it in class goes to summer school.

38: I don't like  Justin Bieber.

39: You spoke Chinese in my English class??  L. (one of girls who speaks Spanish) never speaks Chinese in my class .I give her extra credit. Next time, ask yourself if she would speak Chinese in English class. 

40:  Boy: New girl hit me .
NYC Educator: New girl. Did you hit him?
New girl: Yes.
NYC Educator: I'll give you extra credit.

NYC Educator: If new girl speaks Chinese in my class, new guy gets a zero. If new girl speaks Chinese two times in my class. Ms.S. will call new guy's house. 
New guy: Why?
NYC Educator: Because there have to be consequences.

42. I hate Barney the dinosaur, and one day you will too.

43.  Sorry is garbage. 

44.  It's hard work being a real man.

45. Don't even think about it.
blog comments powered by Disqus