Tuesday, November 03, 2015

The Things We Haven't Lost

by special guest blogger Unity Eunice

I'd like to thank NYC Educator for allowing me to point out the other side to the worthless and vile propaganda you usually read in this filthy and unreliable blog. Mike Mulgrew, hallowed be His Name, never reads the blogs and never talks about them, except to mention that they are "myth." Now that's real class. Instead of calling them BS and crap, which he really wants to, he calls them myth. But that's not all we've accomplished under Mike Mulgrew, hallowed be His Name.

First of all, 30% of the teachers observed by UFT validators were not thrown under the bus. Anyone who tells you they were is a propagator of myth, and we all know what dirty bastards propagators of myth are. Those 30% of teachers have won the right to a 3020a in which the DOE will have to prove they are incompetent. So remember that when those lying bastard bloggers say any more than 70% of teachers facing job loss will have to prove they are not incompetent. Let's not be hijacked by some opposition Gloomy Gus.

Now let's look at the weather. Under UFT Unity's leadership, it's been over three years since we've had a catastrophic disaster. Can MORE or New Action make a claim like that? Of course they can't. They're not in charge, they've never been in charge, and if we have anything to say about it, they'll have nothing to say about it. Do you want Hurricane Sandy to come back and visit every year? Every month? Every week? How can you know that wouldn't have happened if you had left them in charge? Besides, they are all commies anyway.

I'm so sick and tired of hearing about how senior teachers become ATRs, how they're wandering all over the city teaching subjects they don't know and how they have no hope of ever being hired under Fair Student Funding, which we supported. Well, what do you want? Do you think we should have supported the alternative, Unfair Student Funding? That's what the opposition types must want. Plus they are always calling us names, those unwashed smelly bastards.

Think about what you did the last time you were in your school. You walked down a flight of stairs, didn't you? And did anybody push you? Admit it, how many times did you walk down the stairs and not get pushed? A lot, right? And does opposition ever say, "Thank you." to us when they aren't pushed? Of course not. And they are always calling us names, those ungrateful bastards.

Didn't we get a new contract with a raise? And what does opposition harp on? That they have to wait eleven years for the money and that ATRs have second tier due process? Do they ever stop to think that they don't have to wait 12 years for the money and that ATRs haven't got third tier due process? And they call us names, the filthy scumwads.

And why are they always harping on the undisclosed health givebacks, the ones an arbitrator can assign if Mulgrew doesn't meet the savings he promised for the new contract, the one that doesn't exist because the health givebacks are up in the air? Don't they know that Mulgrew could have given back health care altogether and let them sell their homes to pay hospital bills? And he didn't. Yet they call us names, those dirty pieces of crap. 

So decide, UFT, are you going to focus on the things that you've lost, or the things you haven't lost yet? Remember, this is the best of all possible worlds, we are the best of all union caucuses, and Mike Mulgrew, hallowed be His Name, is the best of all union leaders. And for all you know, I'd be saying the same thing if I hadn't signed a loyalty oath and gotten a cool union gig writing stuff like this.

So make sure you don't vote for MORE/ New Action in the upcoming union election, because the most important thing for us to not lose is my after school gig and ability to go on free trips you pay for.
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