Thank goodness we have Meryl Tisch making policy for us. In the old days, we would have students taking Regents exams, and kids would give the exams to their teachers. Then, the teachers would grade them. This was a terrible system. First of all, no technology was involved. Secondly, no corporations made money from this. And worst of all, every single teacher in the world is a lying, worthless, conniving. self-serving fraud who cares about nothing but appearance.
Because of this, we now have a far better system. First of all, we've paid McGraw-Hill 9.6 million bucks to scan all the tests. That's a huge improvement. Not only have we given a corporation millions of dollars, but we've also managed to add the element of scanning thousands and thousands of papers. This, clearly, is highly effective, and that's what matters in King Reformy John's feifdom.
Unfortunately, the parents, students and teachers are failing to get on board with this, simply because it's taking an inordinate amount of time for them to get their grades. When are they gonna sit down and figure this isn't about their selfish needs, but about business? We're finally able to take the money we used to fritter away on teacher salaries and classroom supplies and invest it in America's lifeblood--corporations.
The only real drawbacks are that the scanning is taking a long, long time, that teachers are sitting in front of blank computer screens for hours on end, and that the actual grading is simply not getting done. But again, McGraw-Hill has almost ten million bucks, and that's a win for Mayor Bloomberg. Sure it would have been better to give all the cash to Eva Moskowitz, but that may not have looked right.
So now hundreds of teachers will be earning 42 bucks an hour this weekend to stare at computer screens, and possibly grade exams. You never know whether or not there actually will be exams, as boxes of them seem to have gone missing, but everyone knows it's the thought that counts.
Thank goodness Meryl Tisch brought us this great innovation, and thank goodness Mayor Bloomberg took it to new heights. After all, his financial genius was precisely why we needed to scrap a law twice affirmed by voters so he could but that third term. And I don't see anything inappropriate about her being involved in Bill Thompson's mayoral campaign. After all, with Thompson standing firm for no raises for teachers, there will be plenty more cash to pay the likes of McGraw-Hill.
Views expressed herein are solely those of the author or authors, and do not reflect views of my employers, the United Federation of Teachers, the MORE Caucus or any other union caucus.
Stories herein containing unnamed or invented characters are works of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.