my business theories. When there are layoffs, companies have to do more with less. In New York City, I'm poised to take over an inefficient company. There are simply too many employees, and product is not always of the best quality. For example, we have a lot of teachers, and their product often takes more than four years before it appears on the shelves, or what do they call it? Graduate?
Well, under my administration, we're going to shoot toward having appealing product ready in three years. That will cut production costs by 25%, a savings we can pass on to stockholders. It's unacceptable to raise taxes on our high-earning stockholders like the mayor and Whitney Tilson, who keep their eye on the bottom line
Employees who wish to stay on will have to become indispensable. Who's that person raising his hand, saying, "I'll teach that extra class," or "I'll add a dozen extra products to my workstation." That's the sort of employee who brings value to the system, and we need to capitalize on attitudes like that. Who will come in early and bring the principal a newspaper, a cup of coffee, or a hooker? Who will stay after and paint that room, or fix that boiler for the sake of the company?
Second, you have to have a good attitude. Let's dispense with all these grievances, sick days and related nonsense and get employees to get that product out. I hear, in some schools, 50% or more of product is not getting out. Those offices are not producing and have to be closed. It's important to turn out as much quality product as possible, and we can't hold onto those who are gonna whine and moan, oh, the product wasn't prepared, is missing parts, or doesn't function properly. Ask yourself, how can I get the product ready and onto the shelves, where it can be useful to consumers. I want our product out there being used, whether it be in retail, in offices, or whatever. I want Bill Gates to say, wow, that's a lot of product we're getting in New York City
Finally, you have to be seen. Mayor Bloomberg is very busy, doing whatever he does in that office, and we need the employees out there showing how much they want to produce for him. I want to read how happy they are, how they love pushing out product, how they can't wait to increase production by 18%, or whatever goal we've selected. I want them to stop whining, "Oh, everyone else got a contract, why can't I have one?" That's juvenile. If you can push 40% more product, then maybe I'll give you that raise. It's a new paradigm here, and I want to see employees first in, last out, giving everything they can so the company will produce.
Sure, people feel bad when you close down an office. But you have to put the best face on it possible. No one wants to see 50 empty desks. That's why we'll move out the desks, or bring in someone who can move quality product. Pretty soon everyone will be focused on increasing production, and we'll be pushing more product than any major city. That's why they brought me in, and that's what I'm gonna do.
We'll do whatever it takes to get that product out there.