has denied Mayor Moneybags his choice for chancellor. What does this mean? For one thing, perhaps my cynicism about the panel was unfounded. But it ain't over till it's over, and Steiner may weasel out of it by appointing her with a deputy who has credentials. Perhaps Steiner is concerned, as Bloomberg claims, that no one will want the job if Black doesn't get it.
So Steiner need not trouble himself over that possibility, I humbly offer my services to the mayor. As chancellor, I will break the stalemate that has plagued the DOE and the UFT. I will offer NYC teachers the same salary bump every other union has, since it's manifestly unfair, after insisting on crap patterns for decades, to deny them the one time it's attractive. Next to parents, and perhaps doctors, teachers are the most important people in our children's lives. It's time to stop treating them like trash.
We will build new schools and stop overcrowding. Schools designed for 2,000 kids will contain 2,000 kids. We will gradually reduce class sizes. Instead of laying off teachers, we will hire new ones. If the tunnel to New Jersey has to wait, so be it. It's more important we educate our kids than send them to Jersey, and if there are fewer people in NYC, perhaps our kids will face less traffic in the morning when they go to school. To ensure we reach that goal, we will appoint Leonie Haimson as our parent representative.
We will stop closing schools. Instead, we will improve them. Nor will we mess with charter schools. In fact, since charter schools are so wonderful, we will send every troubled child in New York City to them so they may work their magic. No longer will they have to trouble themselves with lotteries. They'll be far too busy looking for space, since colocations will be a thing of the past--except for one. We will look very carefully at Geoffrey Canada's 100-million dollar building and see whether we can use it to ease public school overcrowding. Surely Mr. Canada won't object to us doing so, since charters have done the same for years.
Every school will have good teachers, decent facilities, and reasonable class sizes. Because let's face it, all this talk about bad teachers is just nonsense so someone like Cathie Black can come in and ask why we need to spend 100K on a teacher when we could ship a body into an ancient wooden chair for 30K. They don't give a damn about kids, but rather dwell permanently on the bottom line. We will toss the bottom liners out on their bottoms. If we need to tax Mayor Mike and his buds to achieve our goals, we won't hesitate. If they want to move to Utah, where taxes are lower, we'll run that risk.
Anyway, I'm at your service, and I can start in February. I don't want to disrupt my students too much. Let me know.
Related: Sign the petition asking Steiner to reject Ms. Black no matter who her assistant may be.