Monday, May 17, 2010

Mr. Slick

Mr. Slick is not at all upset at the new agreement to judge teachers by test scores.  That's because he's going to cheat.  If kids get wrong answers, he'll simply erase them and make them all better.  This will ensure improvement on a regular basis.  After all, his predecessors are not likely to have juked the stats the way he's going to.

His kids are going to show enormous improvement in every area, and it will all be attributable to his excellence as an educator.  There's really no way anyone could determine otherwise, unless a hidden camera catches him erasing and replacing all those pencil marks. 

In fact, maybe Mr. Slick will take a look at  ARIS to make sure he inflates scores in a more believable fashion.  Though it could take ten years, admin might eventually get a clue as to his scam.  Of course, by then he'll have earned merit pay, and likely be an administrator himself.  Maybe he'll be the one who breaks the story about corrupt teachers gaming the system to their advantage.  Stranger things have happened.

But Mr. Slick is not really my concern.  The teachers who really have to worry are those who succeed him.  After all, the test scores will plummet for them, and the system will surely determine they are bad teachers.  They'll be rated "ineffective."  And indeed, their cheating skills do not and did not rival those of Mr. Slick, so maybe they are. 

Perhaps some innovative entrepreneur will provide a cheating course for teachers.  I think there could be big bucks in it, and maybe that's one of the goals of the "reformers" who regularly vilify education schools.
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