Tuesday, March 13, 2007

New Action Holds a Meeting

"Let's get started, please. You all know me. I'm Mike Shulman, dammit, and I was the UFT Academic Vice President."

"We know, Mike."

"We changed everything. We were responsible for the defeat of the infamous zero-zero contract, and we..."

"We know Mike. And a few months later we accepted another zero-zero contract, and..."

"You can't talk to me like that! I'm Mike Shulman, dammit! Why, I oughta..."

"What's that?"

"She's coming! Quick, everyone on your feet!"

"MIKE! Where the hell are you?"

"I'm right here, Ms. Weingarten."

"Well, your boys are not doing a good job. Don't they even know how to wash a car? My chauffeur can't see himself in the SUV wheels. What the hell is that all about?"

"I'll get right on it, Ms. Weingarten."

"And what about my dry cleaning? It took your boy over 80 minutes to get it back to me. That's a 60 minute dry cleaner, and with travel time, I should have it back in 68 minutes, tops."

"It won't happen again, Ms. Weingarten."

"See that it doesn't. I won't be asking you again, and next time, you and your entire gang will find yourselves working at Dunkin Donuts, where there's no second pension for anyone. Got it?"

"Yes, Ms. Weingarten."


"Okay, you can sit down again."

"Didn't I tell you guys you were getting sloppy? How are we gonna bring reforms to this union with your careless attitudes? I can't put up with that. I'm Mike Shulman, dammit, and I used to be Vice President! Did I ever tell you guys how we defeated the zero-zero contract?"
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