Monday, March 12, 2007

Green Eyed Monster (with cheese)

The Prof over at Right Wing Nation regularly posts great Mexican recipes, and prescribes the sort of comfort foods that you long for, yearn for, but fear to eat for the forty pounds you'd gain by week's end.

Sometimes I go over there and drool, while wondering how the conservatives can get away with eating that stuff. I mean, oh my gosh, I don't actually vote for those guys, but I sure wouldn't mind going to a barbecue with then. Still, my guess is no matter how kindred in spirit they may be, Michelle Malkin does not frequent his place.

Now I don't mind when people trash the Yankees (particularly since, in my mind, they're inextricably linked with Saint Rudy). And I don't get all bent out of shape when people make New York jokes (unless they're from New Jersey, which goes beyond the pale).

But last week the Prof went too far. He besmirched NY Pizza, which has been scientifically proven to be the best pizza on God's green earth (I got your studies right here, pal). Have millions of immigrants graced our fair shores for the weather? I don't think so.

Sure, John's Pizza got closed down by the Board of Health. But that's a by-product of an offense committed by Pizza Hut (an offense in itself, of course), which every true New Yorker knows is not really pizza anyway. And it's well know people of all ages will cheat and steal for NY pizza.

Now it's important to note that this attack (which may yet prove to be a conspiracy) comes not only from the right wing. Last week Bill Maher said the reason folks from Hollywood don't get worked up over pizza is that after paying their mortgages, they still had enough money left over to buy real food.

Whatever your political leanings may be, it's time to take a stand.

I want every red-blooded New Yorker to defend our glorious heritage, and a free pizza, on me, to the person who does it best. The best NY pizza, as far as I know, is a few blocks from where I live (feel free to offer other suggestions), but the only reason anyone would attack NY pizza is jealousy. So eat your heart out, Prof. But if you want real pepperoni with it, you're gonna have to come here to get it.
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